superblog

Hear Ye, Hear Ye.

2011-12-04T11:46:00.000-06:00

Note: I started this entry months ago, and am just now getting around to refining and posting it. Luckily, I haven't died yet, so it's still getting out there in time. Phew!

I have some specific requests for my funeral (which are really more like rules, because dammit if they're not followed, I WILL come back from the grave to haunt you), and I've decided to take it upon myself to share them with you. I don't plan on dying until I'm 103 years old, mind you, but still - it never hurts to be prepared. And yes, for those of you wondering, Jake has been informed that he is obligated to live until he's 105.5. He's fine with it, mostly because he has no choice. We will hobble around together yelling, "What's that sonny?" and "damn kids!" in old-people voices while shaking our feeble fists, and playing pranks that only the elderly can get away with. It'll be great. :D

Anyway. Without further ado!

Salwa's Funeral Rules:

Rule #1: No black shall be worn at my funeral. I want attendees to adorn themselves with the brightest, boldest colors they own. Fun accessories encouraged.

Rule #2: Similarly, subdued decor is unacceptable. If there are flowers, they shall be in the most vivid of hues. (I'm particularly fond of peonies, so I'll try to arrange to die in the spring. Although I'd either be just short of or almost a year older than my target death date. Hm. This bears some thought.) If there are balloons, let them be large and red and buoyant. And after the festivities have finished, let the guests inhale the helium within, so that they might talk in hilarious, high-pitched voices to each other.

Rule #3: No somber readings shall be read. Instead, I'd like jokes - bonus if they're dirty - witty poetry, Calvin and Hobbes comics (use of projectors is encouraged), and maybe a passage or two out of an Ayn Rand novel. Booyah.

Rule #4: My obituary shall be funny, and contain lots of sarcasm. A few "that's what she saids" should be thrown in there for good measure. The person reading my obit may or may not choose to employ different voices and/or accents. If everybody is laughing most of the time, I'll wiggle with pleasure in my grave.

Rule #5: The piano, organ, and similar instruments shall be avoided. The music will be loud, have a fantastic beat, and make people unconsciously tap their feet and move their hips. Extra-super-bonus if people actually break out in dance. Song suggestions include Rump Shaker, Da Funk, Another One Bites the Dust (cuz that's just funny), Mr. Roboto, and of course, no Salwa B. funeral service would be complete without Walk Like an Egyptian.

Rule #6: Play games. Something that everyone can enjoy. Good luck figuring this one out. Hehehe.

Rule #7: Any photos displayed must contain at least 50% silly faces/poses. I mean, seriously. I make them all the time - why would you try to filter them out? Bonus points if you take silly photos of yourselves AT my funeral. Do it.

Rule #8: No smoking. Cuz it's just gross :)

I've been fortunate not to have needed to attend very many funerals thus far in life, but I want my own to match my personality. When I was working on my college applications, I asked my childhood best friend to describe me in one word. She thought for a moment, then stated, "vivacious." I think that fits me perfectly, and those of you who know me are sure to agree.

Lest I smoosh you for insubordination.

Some good candidates of photos to use at my funeral:

Insert Creative Title.

2011-10-09T20:20:00.001-05:00

I was trying to think of a witty line to start off this blog post, but then I realized that I shouldn't bother, because there's no possible way I have any readers left anyway. Right? I mean, you're not reading this, are you? And neither is your mom. Exactly. I could probably spew off random nonsense words like deebledee and dinglebats and doornobonia and not a soul out there would notice, not even you, because you're too busy reading someone else's blog. Someone whose regular, thoughtful posts, dashing smile, and tossable hair sets your heart aflutter and makes you weak in the knees.

Fine, I see how it is!

No unicorn feathers for you then! And DON'T even start with me about how unicorns don't have feathers, because you know what? They do. I'd know, because I bought 5 of these precious delights off the internet for only three easy payments of $49.99 + shipping & handling. And to think I was actually going to give you one! Ha! Fat chance of that now.

Here's the thing. I've been pretty busy doing stuff. Also, things. Doesn't leave a lot of time for blogifying.

To make up for it, here's one extra-super-long blog post describing some of the aforementioned stuff and things. Probably mostly in picture form, because seriously, this writing thing can be a pain.

We'll start with the beginning of the year, because that's how we roll.

January - was cold. Don't remember much else.

February - also cold. I took a trip to Salt Lake City, UT for work, and the sun's presence did not quite make up for the ferocious winds that threatened our ability to walk like the advanced primates that (I swear) we are. Snow storms are fun! On the second night, my colleague and I were enjoying a fine meal of what had to be three-day old Caesar salad in the hotel lobby when the lights flickered, and then went out. We were without power until about 3am. That night I learned the utility of the iPhone flashlight app. Good times!

Winter Wasteland in SLC, UT

March - hey, what do you know? Still cold. Apparently a lot went down in March though. *deep breath!*

I was excited and grateful to have pulled off Winter Personified, a creative concept fashion shoot I'd dreamed up. I'd been planning it for months, and thanks to a wonderful team, was able to bring it to life. Alex, the model who braved the insanely cold weather in far less clothing than a sane person should wear. She's on a frozen lake in the photo below. In a bikini. Heath, the hair and makeup artist who turned Alex into Winter herself. He's awesome and we'll be working together again fo-sho - see his work here: http://www.heathbryant.com/. And Jake, who stayed out in the cold with us to help me lug around the car-ful of props I needed.

To see Winter's story, go here: http://www.salwabullard.com/2011/winter-the-woman-behind-the-freeze/.

So, apparently people do this thing where they leave the super-cold tundra and spend a few days somewhere warm. A novel concept! This March, we thought we'd try it out, and took a trip to Puerto Rico with our friends Jessica and Pete.

As you can see by our expressions in the photo below, we hated every minute of it.

Within an hour of leaving the airport, we were walking on the beach.

Tromping around a fortress - El Morro

Hiking in El Yunque National Forest

Arecibo Conservatory. Featured in such fine films as Contact and GoldenEye.

Enjoying a lunch break at El Senor

To see some of my favorite photos of Old San Juan, go here: http://www.salwabullard.com/2011/pr-osj/

Also in March, Jake's parents celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary! Isn't that wonderful? We threw them a party to celebrate.

A metallic B&W float wrap of a a photo I'd taken of Cyndy & Dick a few years ago

April - Still. Freaking. Cold.

May - Fine, MN. Stay cold. We'll just peace out and wander around France and Italy for a few weeks. What do you think of that?!

Brace yourself - lots of photos in this section.

We stayed in an apartment that was about a 20 minute walk away from Notre Dame. I love Paris.

Outside Notre Dame. Just love that gate.

We were really looking forward to our visit to le Chateau de Versailles. I'd been there before and was excited to see it with Jake, because I knew he'd love it. We carefully planned around their closed dates (Monday, and the first of May for some reason). When we arrived, a few metros, a train ride, and a long-ish walk later, we didn't see a line for tickets. Nor did we see anyone selling them by the giant red banners that read "Billets." We wandered within its outer gates, and it wasn't until I happened to need to go to the bathroom that I saw the teeny tiny 8.5x11" sign with 12-point font declaring the Chateau to be closed for the day. Seriously, people? On the plus side, the gardens were open and they are VAST, and so beautiful. So we spent the afternoon wandering through them on what turned out to be a very nice day indeed :)

Les Jardins de Versailles

Although I make a very poor choice of footwear on this particular day, we really enjoyed our trip to la Tour D'Eiffel. Just before nightfall, we rode to the top and took in the amazing view of Paris. Totally worth the wait.

La Tour D'Eiffel

If there are a lot of food photos, it's for a reason. That was a definitely a highlight of this trip!

I love chocolate mousse

One of our favorite meals in France - a picnic outside our B&B with bread from a boulangerie, meat from a charcuterie, and cheese from a fromagerie.

A delicious meal in beautiful Nice - a new favorite city of mine

Beautiful weather in Nice, France

Lemon trees were everywhere in Cinques Terres, Italy

Turns out anchovies are delicious when prepared fresh, with lemon, olive oil and herbs! Who knew?

Just a little beach time in Monterosso, Italy.

Gelato!

I bought this painting for my office from this very talented and sweet artist, Sara Lovari in Cortona. She posts a lot of her work on Facebook - check out here page here!

Jake loves knockers! In Tuscany.

Some famous monument in Rome. No biggie. (KIDDING! it was amazing)

I wasn't a big fan of Rome. I probably wouldn't go back unless Jake really wanted to, even though we missed a number of sites thanks to a vicious virus that kept Jake bed-ridden for a day or so. It's not that I don't like big cities, because I do...I don't know. Rome just seemed colder. Almost disdainful. That's a weird thing to say, I know.

The Vatican was incredible. However, Jake and I both found St. Peter's Basilica to be not just ornate, but ostentatious. Neither of us felt even a bit of spirituality in the place, especially when compared to Notre Dame. There's no denying its beauty, but we left the building feeling uninspired.

St. Peter's Bascilica

All in all, an amazing trip!

June - Warmth returns to the land :)

We enjoyed Magda's Feast v.2011 with Jessica, Pete and Nadeen.

Our awesome hosts firing up the BBQ

A VERY appreciative bunch enjoying my mom's amazing spread!

Jake's so special :)

Replicating the exact same pose we did in Magda's Feast v.2007. Are we weird?

S'mores!

July - Lots of family-time, which I love.

When you work with your husband and your best friend, this is what happens to your cube on your 30th birthday :)

I'm still finding confetti in various places in my stuff...

Birthday dinner w/my family!

4th of July w/my handsome bro

At the end of July, my parents moved to FL. We were (really) sad to see them go, but they've always wanted to move somewhere warm, and this was their year!

Goodbye Dinner w/the families

Goodbye party at Anna's

Family

Aren't they sweet?

For years and years, pretty much since I graduated college, I've gotten the same advice. "You should buy a house!"

"It's a great investment," they said. "You're just throwing your money away on rent," they warned.

I always politely declined to take this well-meaning platitude seriously. I had no interest in owning my own home until I was married. I had a myriad of reasons. Because I didn't want to care for one on my own. Because I didn't want to commit to living somewhere for the next 3-5 years (ha! and what a joke that timeline turned out to be). Because I had no use for a 'starter' home that I knew I would just end up moving out of anyway.

Because I wanted the first house I lived in to chosen by both myself and my future husband, whomever he was.

Apparently, Jake had gotten the same advice over the years. Luckily, neither of us listened. Even after we got married, we waited. We felt no need to jump into home ownership. We had traveling to do and hobbies to explore, both of which require money and time, as do houses.

This year, we decided we were ready. Activate house-hunt. Incredibly, we found a house that is perfect for us, and in the school district we wanted. Yay!

August - we packed, and we moved. Hiring movers was the best decision ever. Also, we're never moving again, because moving still sucked.

Wow, this post is LONG. Code word 'fiddle' - if you're still actually reading this leave it in the comments for a chance to win one unicorn feather!

September - More stuff. And things. Good stuff/things :)

Fun with our very good friends in Grand Rapids.

Stop eating so I can photograph you having fun, dammit!

Seth is precocious and adorable and such a sweetheart!

Me, Natalie and Seth

October - has been strangely warm. Not complaining! I love the fall, even if it's not quite sweatshirt weather yet.

The Seattle Bullards visit MN. That Ian's a sassy one!

From this afternoon

And with that, I'm all caught up! Hurray! Kudos to you if you've made it this long. Time to go do a little reading!

Very Important Update

2011-04-07T20:28:00.000-05:00

Two nights ago, I baked s'mores cupcakes.
And they were delicious.
(Yes, that's my update. I told you it was important!)

The recipe: http://www.bonappetit.com/recipes/2011/01/smores_cupcakes

The intermediate product: graham cracker cupcakes + chopped Ghiradelli chocolate:

(Green face courtesy of iPhone)

A few words about the fluff-filling:

I didn't have an apple corer to make the hole. A 1/2-tsp measuring spoon did the trick quite nicely. A drill probably would have worked too, though.

The homemade pastry bag? Not so much. Messy and wasteful - lots of fluff got stuck inside, unwilling to be coaxed out. I switched to using a teaspoon measuring spoon + a 1/4-tsp measuring spoon for scraping. Probably would have gone easier if I'd given both a quick spray with non-stick non-food stuff. Next time.

Here's a close-up of the filled cupcake. In the back, you can see Jake starting to spread the ganache on the top. Adding the hot whipping cream over the chopped chocolate wasn't enough to completely melt it or keep it warm enough to spread. I'd put the chocolate in a metal bowl, just in case, and Jake ended up putting it over a pot of boiling water - worked well!

The cupcakes (complete with filling and ganache) were made the night before. I 'roasted' marshmallows (instead of fluff) in the manner described in the recipe, the morning of. Of what, you ask? The day I brought them into work. No way was I going to keep 12 (or in this case, 13) of these around the house! Plus, sharing is caring :).

Want to see a close-up of the ooey-gooey? Of course you do.

That's it! Now go forth and make them...it's a once-in-awhile treat that's totally worth the effort!

April's Moon

2011-04-07T06:49:00.000-05:00

The hands flex in anticipation of the meat as they slowly close in

Until they hover, mere millimeters from the flesh, steady,

A breath’s span before they press in, and begin to knead.

Kneading, and pulling

Provoking a like response in innocent, bystanding places.

The music drips in and slides through the crevices, all connected

Unprotected.

It is not waves that sound within.

It’s something else that crashes cruelly. Precisely.

It seeks nothing

It wants nothing

It knows nothing

At the core, as yet untested

(As yet, untested)

Resides a nugget of iron

Cool and immobile,

Ever secure.

Self-Edumacation

2011-02-21T14:31:00.001-06:00

If you've been reading this blog regularly, you know that I'm a self-taught photographer. I've attended a few seminars and workshops, read a ton of books, articles, blogs, and of course, the manuals to every piece of equipment I own. More recently, I've joined a few online forums and groups where thought-provoking, educational discussions run rampant. All of that, plus shooting as much as I can, is how I've learned to hone my skills and develop my style. One of my favorite aspects to this craft is that development, both technical and creative, never has to (and never should!) stop. I love it!

Now, it probably goes without saying, that being a good photographer does not automatically equate to running a successful business. Lately, I've been focusing quite a bit on teaching myself about this aspect, because as much as I love photography, it's not just a hobby anymore. I want to create a viable, healthy, profitable business.

And that simply cannot be done with the rates I've been charging.

It's so interesting thinking about this now, versus when I first started learning about photography. The process went something like this:

Photography = cool. I should practice. You there, gimme your kid and Imma take some pictures of him (and then learn to edit them), okay?
I've gotten pretty good at this! I should start charging a nominal fee, because now I'm offering a quality service that people want, and I should be compensated for my time and efforts.
The pros in my area, who have been around awhile, charge X to Y. I should probably charge way, way less, since I don't have the experience they do. I mean, I like my work, and YOU like my work, but I can't charge what they do. Can I?
And here's where we fast-forward to doing our taxes.

I wasn't diligent throughout the year of keeping track of my expenses vs. income, but yesterday I sat down, located receipts and invoices, and tabulated everything. I spent significantly more than I earned. Now, I know that small businesses don't necessarily turn a profit for the first few years. And I have always been aware that there are some steep start-up costs involved - after all, if nothing else, I am building an inventory of professional-grade equipment, which is all very expensive!

But...there are many other, non-equipment costs that are associated with running the business. Equipment maintenance. Insurance. Web hosting. Marketing. Education. Software. Vendor research and samples. Not to mention my time. A photographer's work does not start and end with the session or wedding. There's the time spent beforehand (corresponding with the client, scouting locations, renting equipment, etc). And then the time spent afterward (downloading, backing up, and importing files, culling, editing, uploading to proofing gallery, fulfilling orders, label-designing, burning to disc, etc).

My time is worth a lot to me, and I should be compensated for it, especially when it's spent on tasks that not just anyone can do, that require talent and hard-earned skills. As much as my shooting style is my own and is being refined, so is my post-work.

So, does it make sense that I would set prices without calculating whether they could cover my costs?

Not really.

And yet, that's what I did. The numbers are in, and they're not pretty. I think maybe a lot of photographers don't account for their costs when they first set their pricing, because if they're like me, they didn't know better. The result is that there is a large range of prices on the market, with the low end rates not actually being high enough for anyone to make a viable living.

Now, you could argue that consumers can weed out photographers based on quality. In most cases, you get what you pay for. But what about the photographers who are actually pretty talented, but don't have as much experience as the next guy? What if for that reason or for any other, they're also pricing themselves really, really low? I'm not talking about charging 10-15% under the local industry standard - I mean more like 80-90% less.

Under-pricing hurts the photographer, because they're working long hours for little or no profit - making it little more than an expensive hobby, right? And at some point, they may want to raise their prices (and if they look at their costs, I'll bet they will). If they've built up a client base who is less interested in the value of what they're getting, and more interested in plain cost, that may prove cumbersome.

The thing is, I've also heard it said that those who under-price can also hurt the industry as a whole. I never understood why until a discussion I was recently involved in. My analogy used McDonald's. Their burgers cost very little, but are crap. (Yes, crap! Don't argue with me on this :P) Does that mean they devalue the burger industry as a whole? No - because I know that if I want better burgers, I'll go elsewhere and pay more. I get what I pay for. So how does McDonald's affect the business of the higher quality restaurants?

They don't. But the analogy is also not appropriate.

Another photographer explained it very articulately. I'm paraphrasing, but essentially she said that McD's is profitable with low prices but also very high volumes, low product quality, and low service quality/time. (When was the last time you went to a McD's and felt wined and dined?) Photographers can and do follow this model too (low prices/high volume), but it means that they have to spend way less time on their clients, their sessions, and their images, in order to be profitable.

But many of us aren't looking to build or have that type of business with that type of model. We're offering (or working towards offering) "boutique," personalized service, with time and care given to each image we produce and each product we offer. That means we spend WAY more time on every aspect of the photography than those who follow the other model.

So if good photographers offer comparable services but charge way less than what they could conceivably live off of (or even just use to cover their business-related costs), they contribute to creating a market with unrealistic expectations of what one should pay for these services.

That made sense to me.

And my own numbers, calculated so recently, drove the point home.

I know that everyone has different circumstances. Some photographers have other jobs, or spouses that work, and therefore don't rely on their business for income. Some don't actually spend that much time on editing or any of the other things I mentioned (be it because they don't want to, don't know how, or have streamlined their workflow for maximum efficiency). And yes, those who are just starting out and having nothing in their portfolios can't possibly expect to charge the same as the pros and get work.

But the thing is, my calculations didn't even account for cost of living (since I do have that full-time job) - just cost of running the business. And they were still way higher than what I could make at the rates I was charging.

So, I'm re-working my pricing structure, based off of real numbers instead of ones plucked from the clouds. My prices will still be lower than more experienced photographers, but the discounted percentage will be reasonable, and still allow me to make a profit.

I don't want to pay to photograph people. I don't even want to just break even. As I said before, I want to create a viable, healthy, profitable business. I want it to be worth my time away from my husband, family, friends, travel, and other hobbies. I am passionate about photography, I seriously extra-SUPER-love it, but I'm also building a business.

I am writing this (very long - kudos if you'd made it this far with me) blog post on my personal blog instead of on my professional one, because a) I've been mulling this over a lot lately, and here is where I do my pontificating, and b) I'll admit, I don't know if I feel qualified yet to discuss setting one's pricing.

But I do think it's our (photographers') responsibility to educate people on the subject. When Jake and I were shopping for wedding photographers, value was way more important to us than cost, but that doesn't mean we knew why the photographers charged what they did. For portraits, weddings, events, or anything else - I don't think consumers are being cheap or jerks when they try to barter for steep discounts - I think they just don't know where the numbers are coming from.

So chances are, I'll eventually put something on the professional website on this subject.

If you're reading this (thank you if you still are!), I would love to hear your thoughts. As a consumer, a photographer, another type of vendor, whatever. What do you know about custom photography pricing? (Not talking JC Penny or Walmart studios here) How do you decide what you're willing to pay? Would you appreciate reading on a potential vendor's site which factors are included when setting pricing (assuming it was well written and not condescending)?

PS - I'm not going to post a link to my website here, but if you're interested in checking it out, please leave me a comment and I'll send you an email! I'd love for you to visit it, but prefer not to link it to this blog.

Respecting Wishes

2011-01-25T07:53:00.000-06:00

I am having trouble understanding why some people insist on dwelling in the past. Friendships are extremely important to me, and always have been. But if I had a friend who told me, for very understandable reasons, they didn't want to hear from me anymore, I would respect that.

For example, a long time ago, I had a boyfriend with whom I was very close during our time together. Best friends, even. After we broke up, we remained friends for years. I thought things were fine, but it turns out, they weren't. He told me that he wasn't over me, and that he needed to cut ties so that he could move on. This was entirely unexpected, but I wished him the best, bid him goodbye, and haven't written to him since.

Do I think he's moved on since then? Absolutely. Does that mean I get to start writing to him again? Hell no. He asked me not to. He knows how to reach me if he wants to reconnect. And if he doesn't...well, I can respect that. I don't feel entitled to be in his life at this point.

And that's the thing folks. This brings me around to a common theme I see everywhere, both on an individual and a grander level. So many people feel entitled to have this or that, without having earned it. I think this may go hand in hand with another pervasive attitude, which is refusing to accept responsibility for one's actions.

So consider this. Consider if I hadn't ended things amicably with the boyfriend, and instead treated him like garbage toward the end. Didn't have the respect for our relationship, or for him, to tell him that I wasn't getting what I needed, that I was falling out of love with him. Instead, I moved on before ending things with him. Lied and cheated to avoid a brutally honest, painful conversation, and then strung him along for weeks or months while I tried to figure out what I wanted.

And afterward, months after the inevitable breakup, I began to harass him. Phone calls and emails demanding his attention, demanding his forgiveness. With my actions, I told him that he owed me. That despite how I treated him, I had the right to to his good feelings, and to remain in his life. That he was petty and weak for casting me out of it.

Does that sound right to you? Does that sound like a person who acknowledges that there are consequences to her actions? Who understands that when she treats someone horribly, they have every right to permanently reject her, because they have too much self-respect to keep someone like her in their lives?

No? Not to me, either.

Delinquent Blogger/Happy New Year!

2011-01-01T18:02:00.020-06:00

Yep. I've been absent from the blog awhile.

WhoopsieFoo.

My November and December have been incredibly busy with three main things. Would you like to know what they are? Of course you would - you're still reading, aren't you?

1. A few last-minute family portrait sessions, editing photos for clients and blogging sessions, and other related miscellany. LOVE!

2. The holidays, of course. Family fun time!!

3. The surprise of the decade.

See, I'm Egyptian. This you probably knew. In December 1995, my mother, brother and I moved to Egypt. Like, to live there, for realsies.

To condense a very long story, living there did not end up working out, so we moved back to America for good. During our 3+ month stay in Egypt, I got to spend a lot of time with my mom's family, and became especially close with her youngest sister Shymaa, only 3 years older than myself. I've mused before about the rarity of finding someone with whom I instantly 'click' - it was one of those cases. We had very different upbringings and experiences, but our personalities meshed so well.

After we moved, Shymaa and I kept in touch for a few years, but the language barrier and snail-mail-only method of correspondence combined forces, and our communications trickled down to nothing for a long time. In the last year or so, I'd been bugging my mom to get me her current address. I meant to send her a letter with some pictures from my wedding, and hopefully rekindle our writing.

I hadn't seen her in over 15 years.

Until November 12th.

I was meeting my parents, mother-in-law and sister-in-law for dinner at a restaurant. We were getting situated at the table, when I heard a pleasant voice ask, "Can I sit here please?"

I turned my head to see who it was, and time...slowed...down.

Thought #1: Who is this pretty lady asking me to sit at our table?

Half-formed thought #1a: Something about how that chair is for my step-dad.

Thought #3: . . .

Nothing. I have never in my life been able to recall a time when my mind wasn't actively chattering, but at that moment it was utterly blank, as I stared at the woman smiling down at me. She was holding a toddler. She looked...familiar.

My mind remained devoid of any semblance of thought for what seemed like an age, until all of a sudden I recognized who was standing in front of me.

It was impossible, though. The woman couldn't have been Shymaa, because Shymaa was 6,000 miles away. In Egypt. Not here. At Ruby Tuesday's, for God's sake.

But it was, and I knew it. I immediately started crying (and if you know me, you know this is not common), and we commenced our reunion.

It's been so amazing to get to spend time with her and her youngest daughter, Shahd, who incidentally turned 2 that day. I know I'm biased, but I'm pretty sure that Shahd is one of the cutest, sweetest, funniest, feistiest, most well-behaved little girls there ever was. Even at such a young age, she is FULL of personality! Jake and I knew that the female members of my family make some of the same facial expressions (mostly the sassy ones!), but in the last couple of months, we discovered that they start at a very young age! :)

Shymaa is one of the sweetest people I know. Seriously, I don't think they come any nicer than her. She is also forthright, unpretentious, genuine, smart, fun, a fantastic mother, and oh yes - absolutely gorgeous. It was SO wonderful to reconnect with her! She is married and has another daughter, age 4 1/2, and I hope I get to meet them one day soon too.

My brother and I grew up mostly without any extended family around. Our brief taste of having them close by, while we lived in Egypt, was indescribable and eye-opening. Over the years, our family has grown to include our Greek 'adopted' family, my terrific step-dad and his family, and most recently, my wonderful in-laws. I am forever grateful that this is the case.

But there is something special about having your blood-relatives around, too. Noticing certain habits or mannerisms, and saying, 'Oh, you do that too?' Bonding over little things like that, and bigger things too. My brother was also in town for both Thanksgiving and Christmas this year, which was a special treat - it was really good to spend some quality time with him.

This holiday season has been filled with family for me, of the pseudo-adopted, by-marriage, and blood-related variety. It's been incredibly special, and thus I ended 2010 on a very positive note.

I know this is a long blog post, and I'm impressed if you're still reading this far. I hope your 2010 was as fabulous as ours, and I wish you...

A VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Cookie Day 2010

Did-did-did-did You See the Frightened Ones?

2010-10-30T10:51:00.001-05:00

When we found out that Roger Waters (former bassist/vocalist of Pink Floyd) was coming to our city, performing The Wall, I got excited, and said, "Oh, we should go!"...and then forgot all about it. My schedule this fall has been insane with photoshoots and weddings and get-togethers and dinglebats and whatnots, and my brain was pretty much full. To the brim. To the brimity brim.

But Jake knew that Pink Floyd has always been one of my favorite bands.

He knew that I grew up listening to and watching The Wall.

He knew that despite loving live music, I don't go to many concerts.

This was quite possibly the closest I was ever going to get to seeing Pink Floyd Live, and let's face it, Roger Waters is getting old. It was pretty much a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

He knew he couldn't let me pass this up. So, he surprised me with tickets! How sweet is he??

The show was AMAZING. No, scratch that. It was perfect. The sound, the lights, the band - everything about it was fantastic. I also found it interesting that he incorporated a few agenda-items, messages of anti-war and anti-materialism, seamlessly into the production. It was a perfect blend of current-event and old-school images from The Wall.

So, so good.

I've never been the type to take pictures at shows (the few I have been to), but there's a first time for everything! I was definitely not properly equipped for 'real' photos, so forgive the blurriness.

The Teacher. This dude was scary as hell.

Do you see Mother in the corner?

Don't Leave Me Now...

The Wall...fully built

My sharpest image from the concert!

This is a terrible picture, but at one point they released a giant pig blimp over the audience.

Thank you, Jake, for an amazing night!

Top 9 Things I Love About Autumn

2010-10-05T21:35:00.001-05:00

I absolutely love autumn! It is probably my favorite season, and this year we've been having fantastic weather which quite frankly, reminds me why I moved back to the tundra. Here are my top 9 favorite things about autumn:

9. Fall means that the winter holidays are right around the corner! GobbleGobble, cookie-baking day (a family tradition), Christmas - I love this festive, cheerful time of year!

8. Halloween! Candy + Costumes - enough said.

7. Preparing to hole up for the winter. As much as I don't like the bitter cold, or the morons who forget how to drive at the first snow of the season, there is something special about holing up inside and getting cozy with a warm blanket, a hot drink, and good book/movie/husband. If only we had a fireplace, the picture would be complete!

6. Honeycrisp apples (thanks, U of M! You done good.)
5. Pumpkin products. I love pumpkin pie. And pumpkin bars. And pumpkin muffins. Basically most pumpkin things. Not Hershey's Pumpkin Spice Kisses, though - have you tried those? Blech. Stick to the chocolate, Hershey's!
4. Squash. Acorn, butternut, buttercup, spaghetti, and so on. Delicious and nutritious!

3. Going on walks with my sexy husband. Fun any time of year, I suppose, but there's something about an autumn walk...

(How do you think he's doin??)

2. Fall = sweatshirt weather! (In theory, anyway). I love the clean crispness in the autumn air! There's nothing quite like it.

And my #1 favorite thing about the autumn...The insanely beautiful colors!!

A few fall pictures from this past weekend...

What are your favorite things about autumn?

Ugh.

2010-09-24T20:09:00.001-05:00

Anyone have any tricks or tips for getting your brain to turn off when when you wake up in the middle of the night to pee and then your brain says, 'hi!' and you say, 'shh, I'm going back to sleep,' and it says, 'wanna bet?' and then starts reciting the 30 things you have to do the next day and categorizing them uselessly while you desperately search for the heavy velvet curtain that you know was there just a moment ago, and if only you could just draw it closed again, it would muffle out the sound of your brain calculating the number of combinations of who-knows-what because you've stopped paying attention to it minutes ago, thinking if you weren't feeding it your attention it would just pipe the F down already, but it hasn't so far, because your own brain is a jerk that hates you?

Just wondering.

Here is a random picture I took in the Willow Falls area from this past spring.

But don't let that detract from the question I asked. Tips and tricks for falling back asleep - spill 'em!

Good Friends, Good Times!

2010-09-08T17:35:00.001-05:00

Friends: Good. Baby: Good.
6-month old, Happy, Curious, Active, Super-Adorable Baby: Really Good.
Getting to photograph friends + super-adorable baby: SO awesome!

It was our pleasure to host our friends Natalie, Jordan, and their six month old son Seth a few weeks ago. We had tummy time, play time, giggle time - oh, and we played with the baby, too!

We had a great time, and it was really neat to see how much Seth has developed since I'd seen him last. I can't remember who was saying this (and I think I heard it third-hand or so), but I totally agree....You know that newborn looks that babies first have? The ones they end up losing as they start to grow into their 'real' features? Well, to me (and to this anonymous person), Seth has always looked like "Seth," even as a newborn - now he just looks like a slightly older baby version of himself.

Seth at 10 days:

Seth at 6 months:

See what I mean?

Here are a few more pictures from that weekend...

Seth

Seth + Mom

Seth + Dad

Mom + Dad

The whole family!

I also got to play with Seth in the park :)

We got some good Team Awesome time in that weekend, too :)

This Is How We Do It.

2010-08-23T18:31:00.001-05:00

To kick off our one-year wedding anniversary weekend, Jake and I went skydiving! What better way to celebrate our love for each other than by jumping out of a small aircraft at 10,000 feet above ground?! That's 2 miles up, for those keeping track.

What a rush! It was so freakity-fracking fun, you guys - if you're not afraid of heights, you should totally try it! It was about 45 seconds of a ~120 mile per hour descent before the instructor pulled the rip cord to open the parachute (because, ahem, I forgot to do it myself).

I wasn't nervous at all, but I did have four distinct "oh shit" moments:

1. Looking out the window at about 1500 feet, and realizing we weren't anywhere near our top altitude. That was already pretty freaking high up!

(Deep breath. Relax. Until...)

2. When they opened the airplane door and all I could see was sky. We are all taught from a very young age via a myriad of horrific scenes in movies that opening the door of a moving aircraft is a Very Bad Idea. Did they know we were 8,500 feet above the earth?! Apparently Jake was also a little 'holycrap' at this point, since he was sitting right next to the door and strapped to an instructor who kept leaning out to look at the clouds.

(Deep breath. Relax. Until...)

3. Watching my husband FALL OUT OF THE AIRPLANE and disappear into the clouds. That was actually kind of hard to see. But I didn't have too much time to dwell on that, because...

(Deep-breath-deep-breath. He's fine. That's what we're here to do. Relax...)

4. When it was my turn to scoot forward and stick my foot on the ledge outside the airplane. That was hard, because there was wind resistance. There was wind resistance because we were TWO MILES ABOVE THE GROUND. The instructor rocked twice, and on the third time, we were out. That may not seem like much time to acclimate to being halfway out the door of a moving airplane, or quiet down what I like to think was my self-preservation instinct screaming at its loudest, but it was. By the third rocking, I was ready to go!

I have to say, free-fall was the most amazing experience. It was like nothing I've ever felt before, not even in my flying dreams. It was incredible!

Free-falling with DJ from Westside Skydivers.

What about you - would you ever sky dive? How did you celebrate your first-year anniversary, or any other for that matter?

One Year

2010-08-19T21:41:00.001-05:00

This weekend, Jake and I celebrate one year of marriage together. I really can't believe how quickly it's gone by. I still vividly remember the butterflies I used to get when he'd walk by (such a hottie!), or better yet, talk to me, in the pre-dating stage of our relationship. And if we were in lab, my lab glasses would without fail fog up when we chatted! How dorky is that?! Thanks, face, for giving me away! And now, here we are.

My crush became my boyfriend became my best friend became my fiancé, and is now my husband!

Now when I look at him, I still feel something move within me - something akin to butterflies, but stronger. I'm not sure there's a word for it. I feel that it's deeper than love. It's...a profound joy, gratitude, wonder, and excitement that I get to spend my life with this amazing man. Adventuring, talking, laughing, playing, supporting each other, building a family together, seeing the world, making each other a better person.

This post is full of words that are my attempt to explain what my marriage, still so young, means to me, but even now I find them wholly inadequate.

I am head over heels in love with my husband. It's been a phenomenal year, and it feels wonderful knowing that I get to spend many more with Jake by my side!

I MISS DANCING!!!!

2010-08-17T21:27:00.001-05:00

I love this one SO HARD:

Alex and Twitch on SYTYCD

And this one makes me sad:

Adechike and Comfort on SYTYCD

Must. Dance. Soon.

Things I Learned in Colorodo

2010-08-09T07:15:00.004-05:00

This past weekend we went to the wedding of one of Jake's friends from high school. It was sincerely one of the most fun (and beautiful!) weddings I've ever been to - we had an absolute blast! It was fun to meet Jake's buddies, and we had a great time exploring what has to be one of the most beautiful places on earth, the Avon/Beaver Creek/Vail area of CO. It was our first time visiting Colorodo, and I learned a few things that I think will come in handy when we go back:

When the rental car guy tries to get you to upgrade from an economy car to something with a V6 engine, he's not just trying to get more money out of you. Well, yes he is, but the line about a 4-cylinder engine not cutting it in the mountains? HE'S NOT LYING. Chugging up incredibly steep, winding, mountain roads in a freaking Hundai Accent while stronger, more muscular vehicles woosh past us giving us dirty looks, as if it were our fault that we couldn't coax the car's little engine to go faster (yes F-nuts, we are DELIBERATELY trying to get in your way) would have been funny, had it not been so painful. 50,000 rpm for a 3 mph gain? Really, Hundai Accent? Sigh.

A "2-hour" drive on I-70 can and will take much longer on Fridays and Sundays. Maybe other days of the week too. There's no way around it...literally. (Get it? Cuz, see, I-70 is the only way to get from Denver to that part of CO. Did I ruin my super-funny joke by explaining it?)

If a restaurant is featured on Man v. Food, it will be packed for lunch, no matter how past-lunch-time you think it is.

Thunder is louder in the mountains. Or maybe it just seems that way.

The mountains take my breath away. Literally. Hiking a "moderate" level trail at 10,000 feet had me winded within 10 steps. I wish I were exaggerating.

Altitude sickness is alive and well, was mad at me, and is capable of giving severe headaches that span several hours.

The Rocky Mountains also robbed me of my figurative breath. They are grand and humbling, and so, so beautiful to behold. Granted, I already knew this from our trip to Glacier National Park 2 years ago, but I re-learned this in CO.

One long-weekend was not enough. We have white water rapids to raft, mountains to leap off, more hikes from which to solicit ass-kickings, and generally we just need more time there to soak in all the beauty.

In the matter of Mountains v. Sea, I'm not sure which would win. We may need to retire somewhere with easy access to both...

Enough of that shmoo.
Here are a few pictures of the awesome!

A much-needed break from the hike up Vail Mountain

Vail Mountain

Enjoying the view

Wildflowers

Jake and I at the wedding

The dapper gents from Thomas Jefferson HS (plus wives/gfs)

Beaujo's in Idaho Springs, CO. Not bad!

Day of Doom

2010-07-13T21:29:00.000-05:00

For about one day a month, I find myself hating everything in the whole universe.
If the sun is out, I'm mad because it's glaring in my eyes and giving me a one-armed farmer's tan on my car ride home.
The birds' chirping songs become a shrill shriek that drown out all intelligent thought and make me conjure up terrible images involving pellet guns.
I hate how the sunlight twinkles on leaves as the breeze moves gently through them, because I know, with absolute certainty, that THEY ARE MOCKING ME.
Peoples' smiles make me snarl, because they're obviously too stupid to understand that EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD SUCKS.

I hate that that's the case - I hate that hormones have that much control over how I feel or perceive things, even for just that one day. I do my best not to let them control how I act, because the last thing I want to do is contribute to the stereotype of women being overly emotional or irrational. But I am sure if you were to ask those close to me, those with whom I can really be myself, they would tell you that my normal sunshine-y radiance is a wee bit muted on those days. If I weren't around when you asked, they'd probably put it in slightly stronger terms. Poor Jake pretty much has to just duck and cover and wait for the worst to blow over. (He never, ever fails to cheer me up by the end of the day, bless his heart).

Here is a long, but by no means all-inclusive, list of things that incite my wrath on this day of death and doom, along with my reasons (click images to enlarge):

And maybe most importantly of all...

Chocolate, in fact, is just about the only thing that makes me feel even remotely human again on this day.

The progression from requiring chocolate to consuming chocolate goes something like this...

Ladies: Right?
Men: Sorry.

CHEERS to being a woman! ;)

PS - No Jakes were harmed in the making of this blog.

Letting Go

2010-07-07T19:35:00.001-05:00

You know how sometimes the most of benign of comments or events can trigger a serious thought process? Well, reading this short blog post about forgiveness caused something to click into place for me regarding a specific situation - the end of a close friendship that I honestly foresaw lasting 'till death.' And while I haven't been actively spending a lot of time thinking about how I've been dealing with this, I can sense an undertone of self-reflection that wasn't really there before. My thoughts have been percolating, and tend to pop up to my consciousness every now and then for consideration.

I think it's time for a shift in attitude.

I don't really want to relive, in blog post form, the slow disintegration of this friendship - I wouldn't even know how to begin. Nor do I really fully understand what happened.

What I do know, is that I did everything I was capable of doing to improve things, and nothing seemed to help. My friend even admitted to me that she knew I was trying my best, but couldn't help but still feel bitter toward me about the event that started the whole downward spiral. Even though she knew I'd done everything she'd asked, everything I could do with the information she gave me. I still can't get that out of my head, and I think it ties in profoundly to the general subject of this post - letting go. I don't think she ever forgave me for my error (which I assure you I never, ever, EVER meant to make - I had no idea what my actions were doing or how they were hurting her)...and now - just now, you guys, as I'm writing this - I'm realizing that this is at the heart of why our friendship ended.

Holy crap.

That's not what this blog post was meant to be about. I didn't mean to scrutinize, as I have done a million times over the past few years, what went wrong. Even though I may finally have come to a conclusion that makes some sense to me. (Was that it? Did her inability to let go of the past taint how she thought of me and how she treated me, despite all my efforts to be a better friend? Is that what made her pull away from me until I finally gave up??) Yargh. There I go again. I derailed myself.

This is not the cleanest post I've written....

Ok. Deep breath...and back on track we go. Dealing with the end of the friendship.

Dealing with the friendship's final dissolution morphed, over time, into dealing with the absence of that friendship. As close as we once were, I felt that absence keenly, and started to absorb the finality of it all. We weren't going to be giggling over anything together when we were 80. Our future children weren't going to be playmates, almost-cousins. We wouldn't even be meeting for coffee next week, let alone all that other stuff. Previously, I couldn't have imagined spending my wedding day without her by my side. I can't tell you how sad it makes me that I didn't even feel comfortable inviting her.

As I suspect is inevitable, my feelings of deep hurt slowly, finally moved over to let other feelings in. Probably just because I've never understood what exactly happened, or what I possibly could have done differently, I started to view the situation in a different light. I cast an accusing eye on the person who hurt me, and let myself feel, if not anger, then at least resentment.

I haven’t tried to stop it. For awhile these feelings actually comforted me, helped me heal, and I didn’t even try to start forgiving. But enough time has passed that I think I need to put a cap on it. Otherwise, I think that resentment could turn to bitterness, and I don’t want that. I don't want to start recalling the negative things about her and use that to fuel more bad feelings. I have too much respect for her, and for our former friendship, to want to taint it like that.

And besides, that's just not good to carry around inside. Life has been too good to me to let myself nurture a dark cloud. It's not healthy, and now that I recognize it for what it is, I don't want to be doing it anymore.

It's time to start letting go.

"Just a Girl"

2010-06-25T11:03:00.001-05:00

Yesterday, as I was pulling heading out of the parking lot at work, I caught sight of my coworker waving in the car behind me. I smiled into my rear-view mirror and waved back.

Then he started honking. 'Yes, R, I see you,' I thought, before my more advanced senses of perception kicked in and noticed that he was no longer waving, he was gesticulating largely, pointing.

'Aw, shit,' I thought, pulled into a spot, and got out of my car. Right rear tire was flat.

He brushed off my assurances that I could just call Jake, and insisted on staying to help. He immediately found the screw I'd run over, and thought first he'd try filling it with air. Maybe it would hold me till I got home. When he was done, we could both hear the air leaking out at a steady rate.

"Nope, that won't hold you. Guess we'll just have to change it," he said.

"Are you SURE you have time to do this? I don't want to inconvenience you - I can just call Jake," I said, worried.

He wouldn't hear of it, hunkered down, and began.

I am so, so grateful to him for A) stopping me (I'd really like to think I'd have felt the flat once I started accelerating, but you never know...) and B) taking time out of his afternoon to get me back on the road.

The thing is, I could not have done it myself. I've never changed a tire, or even seen one changed. And the whole time he was helping me out, in addition to being very thankful to him, I was also incredibly frustrated with myself. This is a basic skill, and a really important one. How is it that I haven't learned to do this?

I don't like not being able to do things for myself.

So I watched intently. He noted my interest and made some comments about what he was doing, as he was doing it. A few helpful hints here and there.

I think I could do it myself now.

I'm not going to wait till I run over another screw, though. I'm going to do a practice run.

I told Jake this, and he wisely suggested that I do so right before a tire rotation - that way, if I don't manage to tighten things properly, I won't be driving around on it for too long. The people at the tire place near me are great, so I am planning on asking them to pay special attention to the tire I change, and let me know how I did.

Once again, SO grateful to R for staying and helping me out!!

What about you? Do you know how to change a tire? If so, when did you learn? If not, who do you call? (Ghost Busters!)

Random Ramblings

2010-06-22T21:39:00.000-05:00

Why is a local radio station asking people to call in and nominate themselves for most notorious cheater? They weren’t technically trying to glorify it, I guess (no prizes for the winner), but why invite people to publicly brag about doing something so disgusting? The concept that made my skin crawl a little, and I didn’t want to support it, so I stopped listening. (To that segment anyway)
Allie's most recent post (yes, we're on a first-name basis, we're BFFs. FINE, she has no idea who I am, jeez, get off my back!) reminded me that although I am pretty good about being an adult, there are certain chores I hate and procrastinate for as long as I can.

Fueling my car. I hate having to stop and interrupt the drive to where-ever it is I'm going. This has bad implications in the winter, since it's supposedly not good to have only a sliver left on your gas gauge, but that's probably just a lie the car industry tells you to scare you into stopping at the gas station more often.
Getting my oil changed (doesn’t matter how long they give me between changes – 3,000 miles or 5,000 – I always go in late).
Folding and putting away laundry. Isn’t enough that I washed and dried it?

A few months ago, I watched Food, Inc. for the first time. It helped nudge us in a direction we were already moving - toward buying and eating more local, organic food. And away from supporting the part of the meat industry that employs some pretty nasty practices. Jake made a comment the other day, that the thing that stuck most with him from the movie is that everything you buy is a vote. It's so true. We may not be socially active in the organic movement (or what-have-you), but we can make a difference. How do stores decide what to stock? Consumer demand. And how does one express this demand? By buying or not buying. I do my best to remember that when I'm grocery shopping.
I really love reading. I think it grounds me, somehow.
In one of my recent emails, I spelled the word "niece" wrong. ("i before e..."). This is the same word that got me eliminated from my second grade spelling bee. True story.

I must sleep now. I think my blog readershiphood's dropped since we went on vacation, but if you're reading this: what are your thoughts on my random thoughts? Your most dreaded chore? Book recommendations? (Any fiction). Thoughts on cheating von cheatersons? Words you still misspellinate?

Sunset

2010-06-17T21:39:00.001-05:00

Jake called me away from photo editing to take a look at some cool cloud formations. I resisted the urge to bring my camera, and went outside to admire them with him.

After a few minutes, I came back in. Kept working. Then glanced out the window.

This time, resistance was futile...

(NO color correction on these photos)

Diagnosis: Duh

2010-06-09T19:41:00.002-05:00

We awoke much earlier than usual, to the tune of 6-something in the morning. Luxuriated in the fact that we had slumbered comfortably in our own bed for the first time in 16 days. Decided to indulge in a breakfast out to welcome ourselves back. I savored my chocolate chip pancakes and we-only-have-1% milk (almost made me wish we'd switch over from skim), and Jake enjoyed his fluffy something-and-cheese omelet. It was a leisurely start to the day.

I'm not sure what filled our time for the rest of the morning, or the rest of the afternoon.

I think I did some extra-super-necessary laundry. Started uploading pictures. Talked to Dave for a few minutes. Started cleaning up the kitchen from the previous day's, much appreciated, Mom-provided meal.

I became aware that I was slowing down, throughout the day.

I thought it was jet-lag.

Bed-time (8pm) approached, and with it, a funny feeling inside. Not the good kind.

'Ah, just in time,' I thought. Figured I'd just sleep off the growing nausea, and wake up good as new. I'd taken the next day off, but thought if I wasn't tired, I'd go in anyway, save that vacation day for later.

It was not to be.

The next day I tried to go about my day. I came downstairs, I had a little breakfast...and that's as far as I got. The rest of my time was spent on the couch, fighting off the worst nausea I think I've ever experienced without puking. (Is that TMI? I'm not sure I care.) For awhile, the only thing that felt right-ish was to lay completely still. As the morning dragged on, even that solution turned stale, and I managed the feat of feeling nauseous without any movement whatsoever. Pepto bismol did nothing. Other druggies did nothing. I silently implored Jake to go out and get me some ginger ale and saltines. He read my mind and offered. When he returned, I discovered a violent hatred for the smell of that foul beverage.

The saltines I nibbled at.

What on earth was happening to me? Aren't people supposed to get sick eating foreign food and drinking foreign beverages? Not when they returned to their native land? What the hell was in those pancakes?

Or did I pick something up on the plane? As I happily watched Twilight: New Moon, then the Hangover on the tiny screen on the seat in front of me, was I obliviously inhaling swampy, recycled, on-the-warpath germ-air?

I didn't know. All I knew is that nothing I was throwing at this thing hit its mark, and I was miserable.

Things turned around for me that afternoon. I was able to sit up and assume a cautiously cheerful expression on my face - a vast improvement over the dour scowl that had taken up residence. I think at some point I walked around - a little light-headed to be sure, but with a distinct reduction in that horrid, sick feeling.

I felt immensely relieved. Two weeks away from an extremely important deadline, missing another day of work was not an option in my head. I had stuff to do, and had no intention of making someone else pick up my slack.

I woke up the next morning with a determination to put myself through my morning routine and end up in my cube, and that's exactly what I did. That day, I answered emails, fielded questions, attended meetings, and started some reviewing. Quite frankly, I amazed myself. My head was barely attached the whole time. I didn't always feel steady on my feet...or in my chair, for that matter. I wasn't nauseous, exactly, but I wasn't right, either. It was a long day, and I was relieved when it was over.

Five days found me finally well again. Well enough to finally remember to act on the curiosity I'd had when pondering the source of my strange malady.

You see, I've discovered that I get quite motion sick in my old age. Knowing that there would be a day on the boat on the Mediterranean Sea during our trip, I asked my doctor to prescribe the Transderm-Scopolamine patch for me. It worked beautifully. The whole time on the water, I felt fantastic. And I noticed that the bus's sometimes very winding paths didn't bother me anymore.

So hell, I thought, why not keep applying it? One patch can be used for 3 days, and I used 3. Enough to get me through the rest of the trip (which included another boat ride, many more mountainous roads, and the airplane ride - all of which had the propensity to make me ill).

So when I became sick, it didn't escape my notice that the symptoms that were plaguing me were the very ones that were prevented by the medication I'd been dosing myself with, for nine whole days.

A few days ago, I pulled out the drug information sheet.

Under Side Effects: "After stopping this medication, you may experience dizziness, loss of balance, nausea/vomiting, headache, muscle weakness, or slow heartbeat. If these effects occur, they usually appear 24 hours or more after you stop this medication."

Oops.

I'd been going through withdrawal!

Diagnosis: duh.

Blog Interview

2010-06-07T17:19:00.000-05:00

This is a cheater-post, because its only content is a link to my blog interview. But you should go read it. Maybe even comment, if you're feeling inspired. It'll be fun :).

http://bloginterviewer.com/randomness/superblog-salwa

As a reward, here is a very frightening picture of me. Why are my front two teeth a different color? You have to wonder...

Hot Air Balloon Ride over Cappadocia

2010-06-03T15:50:00.002-05:00

Hello again!

My friends' comments on the post below reminded me that while I don't have lots of pictures of our trip to share yet, I do have a couple videos of one of the coolest things we did! (And that's a bold statement to make for a trip that was filled with massive daily doses of AWESOME). I've always wanted to take a hot air balloon ride, and I'm so excited that I finally got to! The setting was beyond gorgeous - it was a perfect place for my first ride, and set the standards pretty dang high. And hey, I didn't even have to win the lottery!

Lifting off:

Hot Air Balloon 1 from Salwa Bullard on Vimeo.

In the air:

Hot Air Balloon 2 from Salwa Bullard on Vimeo.

Tell me what you think!

Jake to the Rescue. Again.

2010-06-02T20:09:00.006-05:00

We're back!!!

Normally, this would mean a nice long post about our vacation (which was awesome), with pictures (which are numerous).

However, my body, ever so sensitive to the whims of the wind, has decided to rebel against our return to the States. Instead of falling prey to foreign bugs, its decided it no longer agrees with my native food. Or drink. Or lack of Mediterranean Sea. Long story short, I haven't been able to process my photos yet.

Here is a teaser - just one of many amazing eye-feasts we experienced on our trip to Turkey:

Cappadocia, Turkey

It is SUCH a beautiful country, you guys. I can't even express it properly...so you can be sure my real post about the vacation will be laden with pictures.

But I digress.

This post isn't an overview of our vacation, it's a story about Husband Man Jake...my umpteenth-time hero.

It all started months ago, when we booked a flight that should never have been book-able. An hour layover just didn't seem like enough time to make our connecting flight, and as it turns out, it wasn't. When we arrived in Amsterdam, we taxied aimlessly for awhile (I'm convinced that from above, we looked like we were in one of those hand-held mazes where the object is to get the tiny silver ball from one end to the other), FINALLY deplaned, started the self-transfer process...and found ourselves automatically rebooked. We now had a little four-hour stay in the Paris airport* to look forward to.

*By "the Paris airport," I mean the teeny tiny section of the airport that constituted our terminal, which in their wisdom, the engineers decided would be self-contained and cut off from the rest of the airport, unless of course you wanted to wade through 80 billion levels of security. The length and unwieldy-ness of that run-on sentence, in addition to the creation of the world "unwieldy-ness," is the result of brain-goo that's symptomatic of my feelings about Terminal F. I've chosen to put this asterisks explanation here; I didn't have the patience to wait till the end to write it, so it doesn't seem fair to make you wait to read it.

Anyway. So we were in Amsterdam, twiddling our thumbs and listening to a disembodied, female voice politely threatening to 'offload your baggage' to various late passengers, when an airline attendant at our gate made an announcement. It seems that our aircraft was full to the brim, and simply could not handle one single extra piece of luggage. If we passengers had two pieces with us, we were kindly asked to check one, and were assured that it would meet us in Paris or our final destination.

OR OUR FINAL DESTINATION.

You can guess where I'm going with this. I had my camera bag, and I had my similarly sized (i.e. relatively small) carry-on, in which I'd done some clever redundant packing, in case the airline lost my checked bag. Ha. I'd also, quite non-redundantly, packed my swim suit and toiletries in this bag. Not sure why.

EVEN though my back-pack wasn't very large and really wouldn't take up much space, and EVEN though I had some misgivings, I chose to cooperate with their "request." (When you are thanked kindly in advance for cooperating with one's request, it carries rather menacing undertones - an implicit implication, perhaps, that failure to do so might result in some very unpleasant consequences).

Fast-forward.

Midnight-ish found us in Istanbul, about 10 hours after we'd naively hoped against hope to make it there.

For some reason, I wasn't surprised when the conveyer belt didn't produce my small, green backpack. And for some reason, I wasn't surprised when the Baggage Finder Helper People nodded in recognition when I gave them my name, and told me that they were very sorry, but my bag didn't make it on the flight to Istanbul.

Never mind that the airline had had FOUR HOURS in Paris in which to move the bag from one plane to another in the same, maddeningly small terminal...clearly that was asking too much.

The next flight from Paris to Istanbul was at 2pm later that day. I gave the Baggage Finder Helper Man our hotel's address in Istanbul, and allowed myself to believe him when he agreed that my bag could be there before we left Istanbul at 7:30pm. (Jake, meanwhile, had no such faith in their abilities, but wisely kept that to himself at the time).

I was exhausted. I was crabby. I was angry at the airline, and irrational enough to exact some perceived revenge by purchasing over-priced, designer eyeshadow from the Duty-free shop. (You want me to run around Turkey without makeup, Airline? Well, I'LL SHOW YOU!). I knew I was crabby and angry and choosing a crappy color because I was exhausted, I couldn't help it, and knowing it didn't make me any LESS exhausted, so basically I was in a sullen, sleepy funk that festered on our 45-minute shuttle ride to the hotel.

That should set the scene for you.

Imagine, then, my mood when we were getting situated in the hotel room (circa 2AM), and it sluggishly dawned on me that the piece of luggage I did have with me, which I had scrupulously locked with a TSA-friendly lock, could not be unlocked.

Oh yes. The keys were in my backpack, in Paris.

My mood blackened further, and the prospect of less than a full night's sleep was the grey icing on the cake of death and doom.

I sunk into sleep.

Later that morning, I awoke to the sounds of Jake puttering. I mumbled incoherently and kept my eyes tightly shut, trying to keep out the world for just a few more minutes.

"Do you have a bobby pin?" Jake asked.

I thought for a moment, then frowned. "No," I replied bitterly, "those would also be in the backpack."

I burrowed a little deeper into the pillow and into my mood, letting vague impressions of foulness coat my thoughts toward KLM and the morons who couldn't manage the feat of a very short-distance transfer of one measly bag.

Meanwhile, the tinkering noises continued. "We'll just have to ask at the front desk if they have something that can break the lock," I near-growled.

Tinker, fiddle, zip, clink.

Then a pause.

"You owe me big-time!" I heard Jake say triumphantly. Hope and incredulity bubbled up inside of me as I rose from my prone position.

"You actually got it?!"

"Yup!" Jake held up the opened lock proudly. He had actually picked it!! "Your hair pin may be ruined, though."

Ha! Who cared?! Fresh clothes! Sunblock! More importantly, something went right and my spirits were lifted!

Jake's happy grin fairly shone with angelic light....my hero. Again :D.

I'm Procrastinating (v.May 2010)

2010-05-09T11:18:00.001-05:00

Ten years ago: I was wrapping up my sophomore year in college, enjoying the crap out of life! I was excited about the prospect of my summer research fellowship, and the evolution of something new.

Five years ago: I was working as a temp at a large medical device company, feeling very malcontent, unsettled and a little desperate to change my situation. I didn't fully realize it at the time, but I was in the unhealthiest relationship I'd ever experience.

One year ago: I was enjoying the last, whirlwind months of being engaged and wedding planning! Looking forward to August like nobody's business. Feeling SO lucky and excited to be marrying my perfect man. Looking forward to a weekend of bridal party fun. I was also packing up and happily saying goodbye to my apartment, and last few weeks of living allll byyyy myyyyseellllffff!

Yesterday: Was a super-fun day, despite not having slept well the night before. We got our hairs cut, and then celebrated Mother's Day with both families at Jax Cafe. I was particularly excited to give the moms their present this year:

Then we went to REI, where I proceeded to buy half the store. Oops. It's ok though, because even though I bought MORE for our pending trip, it will allow me to pack LESS. For example, now I have a jacket that functions both as a wind-breaker, a rain keeper-outer, AND a coffee maker! Genius? Yes, yes it is.

Today: I am enjoying a piece of freshly-baked corn bread, courtesy of you-know-who. I am also blogging to procrastinate getting on with my day, which will include cleaning, laundry, putting away laundry instead of leaving it in the baskets until it's time to do laundry again, more cleaning, and a practice run of packing for our trip. I want to figure out exactly what I'm taking now, so that I win. Maybe if it's not too windy out I'll go for a bike ride, too :).

Tomorrow: is Monday. Which is kind of shmoopy, but I'll get over it. Will decide which muscles to tear up after work.

Five snacks I enjoy: Homemade popcorn, fresh berries, almonds, homemade roasted, seasoned chickpeas, and lib (Egyptian melon seeds).

Five things I would do with $100,000,000: 1) Pay off our and our families' various loans/mortgages. 2) Quit my job (sorry, job, I like you, but you know how it is) and travel the world with Jake, volunteering in various countries and photographing everything. 3) Invest it wisely so that we could live out our days pursuing our many and varied hobbies. 4) Take a hot air balloon ride. Because I've always wanted to. 5) Buy one of these:

Five locations I’d like to run away to: 1) Hawaii (Cliché? Maybe. But it was seriously the most relaxing and beautiful place I've ever been!). 2) New York City. 3) South of France. 4) TBD, and 5) TBD.

Five bad habits I have, according to Jake (this should be good): 1) Neglecting to put left-overs back in the fridge. 2) Leaving my plates of seed-shells undisposed-of. 3) Completely remaking the bed after he's already in it (trust me, this is his own fault). 4) Dumping my purse and shoes in the middle of the hallway. 5) And the number one bad habit (which I totally knew he'd say, and I find it SO amusing that it drives him nuts!): Making a pb&j sandwich, leaving the peanut butter open on the counter, and leaving the knife, still coated in peanut butter, dangling off the edge of the sink or a random precipice!

Five things I like doing: “like” = “love:” photography, reading, dancing (which I haven't been doing lately, and MISS), singing, being with friends who know me well, and spending time with family. I know that's six things, but I don't care and you can't stop me.

Five things I would never wear: 1) Dresses with that floral print that are sadly, vomit-inducingly back from the 80s. 2) Dresses with pockets, which fall right at the hips. Hour glass figure = wide hips = don't put bulky material there. 3) Mini-skirts. They're just not for me. 4) Jumpsuits. HOW are those back?! Why did those ever exist in the first place? Nevernevernevernever. 5) This:

Five TV shows I like: Glee, The Office, 30 Rock, LOST, and LOST, which counts twice because of its awesomeness.

Five biggest joys at the moment: My marriage (this counts for everything, but I'll list 4 more anyway), our life, my friends and family, travel, and my photography.

Five favorite toys: My camera with its various accessories, my computer with its various softwares, my bike (yay, spring!), my rollerblades (yay, spring!), and your face. You know I had to.

The. End.

Salwa vs. Suitcase

2010-05-08T20:23:00.005-05:00

All right folks. An epic battle is rapidly approaching, and I am flexing my mental muscles in anticipation.

I, Salwa, do hereby declare that I will vanquish my foe...the Suitcase.

Why, you might ask, am I waging war on a seemingly benign inanimate object?

Because, my friends, it thinks it can defeat me. It thinks that I, who once brought a house-sized suitcase in addition to a carry-on for a 3-day girls trip to Vegas (I'm not kidding - there were 21 pairs of shoes between the 3 of us), will not be capable of packing 15 days worth of living into its mere 74 liters.

In case you don't believe me about the shoes...

(Not all 21 pictured. The rest were probably cavorting in another corner).

Anyway.

What Suitcase doesn't know is that I have allies. Allies such as Truth and Justice. And ExOfficio underwear. Which, I'm not gonna lie, has me a little skeptical. Ok, why mince words - it grosses me the frick out, even with nightly washings. All I have to say is that they'd better not be kidding about their anti-bacterial material. (After all, how would I verify that? No - don't answer that). I won't share how many pairs I'm bringing, but let's just say it's more than 1 and less than 15 - enough of a deficit to free up some very valuable space.

I also have HUSBAND MAN on my side, who could and probably will happily rotate between 4 t-shirts and 2 pairs of pants without missing a beat. Jake has (somewhat gleefully) taken on the title of Official Clothing Veto-er. He is positively relishing the prospect of getting to tell me what I can and cannot bring...and having me actually listen.

Maybe.

I'm still not convinced that I won't give him one of my patented Looks, Eyebrow Raises and "Oh really?"s and do what I want anyway. In fact, he may have a small battle ahead of himself as well. But I think he knows this, and is doing a little mental preparation of his own.

And lastly, friends, what I have on my side is a little something called I Don't Want to Carry a Ton of Crap all around ****. (**** = the location of our trip, which I will dramatically reveal once we've come home. Why? To build mystery and intrigue, of course. To keep you waiting with bated breath for my return. Never mind that if we're Facebook friends, you probably already know where we're headed. Or DO you??? <-- creates more mystery and intrigue).

Anyway, the point is, this trip involves travel (redundant? I think not), and this suitcase has straps. Which I plan on using when necessary. Which may or may not be often. Just in case it is, it would behoove me to minimize what I bring to keep the load light.

And that, dear readers, is why I shall emerge victorious in the lion-hearted, valiant, impavid, valorious, stouthearted, and FIRE-EATING (all synonyms I enjoy of the word "epic") sortie with Suitcase.

2010 Twin Cities MS Walk (in pictures)

2010-05-04T10:55:00.005-05:00

Our team: Veronica's Victors, the MN Chapter, comprised of Jessica and myself.

When we got there, I found out that I'd raised enough money (>$1K, I think) to make VIP status! This meant I got to go into the special tent pictured here, and eat pizza, pie, and tiny candy bars to my heart's content before and after the walk, if I so chose. I did not so choose, but darnit the option was there! I also got to use the super-special porta-potties along the way. Ok, so the porta-potties weren't exactly 'super-special,' so much as 'exactly like all the other ones but with a big orange VIP sign.' And I wasn't even going to use one until Jessica sassed, so I did just to nettle her. No waiting in line for me!

I was also awarded a fleece scarf and a $5 GC to Baker's Square, for raising >$500. As you can see, I'm pretty thrilled with my loot.

The walk starts at Minnehaha Park, and is along a gorgeous route. This is my third year participating, and I never get tired of the views. We've had perfect spring weather every time I've done it!

While we were walking, Jake relaxed, read, and took pictures of trees. It's what he does. :)

My parents drove down to support us! How nice is that? Naturally, my mom cheered on the other walkers, giving them high-fives as they headed toward the finish line.

Approaching the finish line...

Thanks to my parents, both for contributing to the cause AND for coming down and cheering us on in person!!

Thanks to Jake, my wonderful husband and staunchest supporter, who is always, always there for me.

Thanks to Jessica, my awesome teammate and BFF, who made two and a half hours (really?!) fly by!

And a HUGE thank-you to everyone who donated! I raised $1100 for the MS Society, and most certainly could not have done it without your generous support!!

Until next year, my friends :)

Pasta Time

2010-04-30T18:47:00.003-05:00

Nothing much tonight, but just wanted to share a few pics of the homemade pasta I made. Pasta recipe is courtesy of the book Ratio by Ruhlmann.

Have a great weekend!

~Jake

Spring!

2010-04-28T20:21:00.010-05:00

Today, according to the 4-week workout plan I signed myself up for (without myself's knowledge or permission, I might add), I was supposed to do 45 minutes of cardio on the Step Mill. Now let me tell you a little something about the Step Mill.

It's the devil.

That's right,

This machine is the perfect torture device:

A) Climbing stairs is easy. Climbing stairs for 45 minutes HURTS.

B) It's insanely boring. There's no summit! Nothing to look forward to at the top, because there is no top!

C) As my good friend pointed out, you can't have A & B with no C. But trust me, A&B are enough.

Anyway, so instead of submitting myself to this particular brand of hell, I chose to go on a bike ride.

It was absolutely the right choice to make.

I decided to forgo my usual route in favor of a little exploration. I started on a wide, paved path, and found myself on a pretty busy street. Just as I was about to turn around, I saw a little sign that said "Park, 350 feet <---".

'Well, I like parks,' I thought. 'Why not?'

I turned into a gorgeous neighborhood, and spotted a path that led down a hill. That's where I found myself in the prettiest, most picturesque park.

If it were practical, I would probably carry my camera with me 70% of the time, and areas like this is why.

There was a paved path along a pretty pond, surrounded by green. As I biked over an undulating (only in shape, its structure was sound) wooden bridge, I saw a turtle swimming in the water! I probably would have clapped my hands in child-like glee had I not been enjoying staying upright on my bike.

I passed by something called Butterfly Paradise - and indeed, spotted several of the winged beauties. The whole area was adorned with the pink flower trees whose name I don't know but the sight of which make me swoon a little.

I passed by several people enjoying an early evening promenade, and every one of them looked relaxed and happy, and greeted me with a smile. A welcome change from passing strangers on the street who seem determined to stay in their no-eye-contact, we-exist-in-separate-worlds bubble.

The icing on my bike-ride-cake was the scent of lilacs wafting through the air - a personal favorite!

This is what the spring-time is about, my friends! Sure, I swallowed what was either a floating cotton fluff or a small bug (I choose to believe in fluff). And sure, I almost ran into the man who responded to my, "on your left" call by turning his occupied stroller sharply to the left. But who cares! It was a gorgeous evening and a wonderful ride! I love spring! And exclamation marks! I love those too!

And as a bonus - the sprinkles on the icing, I suppose - I still got a decent workout. It was windy, hilly, and my legs were still screaming ever so softly from yesterday's leg lifts.

In conclusion,

Tell Me If I'm Wrong

2010-04-16T07:50:00.000-05:00

Ok, so on this week's installment on Tell Me If I'm Wrong, we're going to talk about restaurant etiquette. Of the staff.

So the other night, the hubster and I (yes, I just called him the hubster, and no, I won't apologize or take it back) decided to stop at a big chain restaurant who shall remain unnamed for a quick bite. We got there around 9:15, unsure of whether they were still serving dinner. However, the sign on the door assured us that they were open until 10pm, so in we went.

We were seated quickly, served quickly, and treated nicely by the waiter. That's not my beef.

My beef is with the fact that during our entire meal, there were staff members carpet-sweeping, table wiping, shaker-filling, and just generally cleaning up for closing. It was actually really distracting, and kind of irritating. That never would have happened had we stopped by at a "normal" dinner hour. We weren't the only ones there, I should point out. Shouldn't customers coming coming by late be treated in the same manner as those eating earlier? If the restaurant is open until 10, shouldn't the closing process start at 10? Is it really ok to be cleaning up around us when we're trying to enjoy our meal?

I don't know though - I've never been in the restaurant industry. Maybe that's par for the course, and maybe I'm off base in thinking that was kind of rude.

What do you think?

Mr. Trainer Man

2010-04-11T10:23:00.000-05:00

Hi there.
I'm Mr. Trainer Man.
When I'm not teaching some sap to push through the pain, tear down each and every of their muscle fibers, and rebuild them one by one, I'm snapping my gum with my mouth open.
That's how everyone knows how awesome I am, cuz I'm all casual-like while I'm training the crap out of people!
I also like to check my phone every few minutes or so, to make sure we're on track for time. Can't have sessions going long; my time is precious, baby! And by precious, I mean mondo expensive-o, because I'm the bombest trainer there is!
My techniques should be studied and used by all trainers.
I like to grunt and strain loudly right along with the person I'm training, so they know that I feel their pain. Helps them get through their set, ya know?
Sometimes I whip out my wicked Arnold accent, and yell, "Come on, girl! Push through it! 15 more! Juuuuussss dooooo iiiiiiittttt!"
Heh Heh Heh.
Hey look, that got a laugh from all the people watching me. Yeah dawgs, let's share a private chuckle.
I should do it again.
"Come on! Pump iiitt uuup."
Look, I made some other girl over there laugh with my bitchin Ahhhnold accent.
Man, I'm funny shit!
I also like to praise my little trainees in a really loud voice, so that everyone around me knows what an awesome job I'm doing at training.
I usually pace while I'm timing someone, not cuz I'm bored, but so they'll get a sense of urgency and move faster. Works, too.
I don't always look at them while I'm giving my awesome words of encouragement, but it's all good, they know I love 'em.
Oh hey, there's my buddy coming out of the locker room.
Bump fists.
Unh.
Yeah, I'm hot.
I'm always looking around to see who saw me being hot shit. I think that hot chick saw.
Yeah.
How fracking awesome do I look, training the crap out of this woman? SO fracking awesome.
Check my phone.
"Two more, last two, girl, you got this."
I OWN this gym. This is MY gym.

Multiple Sclerosis: Begone!

2010-03-17T21:42:00.000-05:00

With spring, comes time for my now-annual MS Walk!

The Why: One of my best friends was diagnosed with the disease a little over two years ago, and it is in her honor that I am walking. She is an incredibly special person - I know everybody says that about their friends, and yes, I'm probably a smidge biased - but honestly, it's true. I can think of very few people who are as full of life (she grabs it by the balls and makes it her own!), love (she has such wonderful friends and family...AND she's getting married this year!!), and laughter (oh, the giggles we've shared over the past 12 years!) as V. I'm walking for her, and for everyone else with MS.

The What: The Twin Cities MS Walk raises money to fund cutting-edge research, as well as the ever-important support programs for people living with MS. This year it's on May 2nd, and my goal is to raise a daunting $1000. With your help, I know I can do it!

The How: Make a donation! Any sum, small or large, makes a difference, and will contribute to this great cause. I know times are tough, I know the economy's bad, I know money's tight. But MS hasn't taken a break, so I'm not going to either. Thanks so much!

My personal MS fundraising page: http://main.nationalmssociety.org/goto/salwabullard.

Roast Chicken!!!!

2010-03-12T13:45:00.003-06:00

I’ve had a large chicken (~6 lbs.) in the freezer since before Thanksgiving so I decided to get it out of there and give it a good roast. I’ve done a few chicken and turkey roasts over the past 6 months or so but haven’t been super happy with how they’ve turned out (although they’ve still been quite edible and maybe even a little good). I feel like I need a little more experience and practice roasting. So I’m documenting a rough outline of what I did mostly for myself.

I’ve read quite a bit about all the glory that is the brine. It’s really supposed to inject flavor and seasonings while keeping, the chicken in this case, moist and tasty. I based my brine concentration off the formula I found in Ratio by Michael Ruhlman. This is a great book that gives working ratios for breads, pasta, stock, brine, etc. Perfect for the science-minded individual like myself.

The brine concentration is 20 parts water to 1 part salt by weight. I ended up using metric because, well, it’s just damn easier—although I did have to convert the grams of salt to ounces because my scale just doesn’t roll that way (keep in mind that one mL of water equals one gram and most measuring cups do have a metric scale on one side).

The night before – the brine:

3 Liters of water (3000 mL)

150 grams of salt (convert to ounces and weigh – but don’t measure ounces volumetrically as the volume will vary depending on the type of salt you use)

1 cup onions

1 cup carrots

1 cup celery (ok not the standard mirepoix ratio of 2:1:1 of onion, carrot, celery, but who cares!)

2 T pickling spice (penzey’s mix – yum)

1 T apple cider vinegar (probably double this next time)

1 T or so sugar

Some black pepper

Procedure: Saute diced mirepoix in olive oil for about 10 minutes or so. Add salt, water, and all the other good stuff. Bring to a quick simmer then cool to room temp or a little below. An ice bath works well (just fill the sink with water and ice and drop the pot in) – I usually try to avoid cooling in the fridge because it warms up the temp in the fridge too much.

Meanwhile, rinse the chicken or turkey out well. Drop the chicken in the brine ensuring it’s completely covered and refrigerate overnight or for about 12 hours. Note: I used a large dutch oven but still had too much liquid so that it overflowed when I dropped the chicken in. Next time I’ll probably use only 2 liters of brine. Just be careful and drain excess in the sink if necessary. Also, make sure you use the 20:1 ratio of water to salt as the salt concentration is the most important aspect of the brine.

The Roasting:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Dice another cup each of onion, carrot, celery and place in the center of your roasting or sheet pan and maybe drizzle a little olive oil over it. Make this into a mound centered in the pan. Place roasting rack over the mirepoix.

Prep the chicken next. Pull out of brine, rinse well, drain, and pat dry with paper towels. Truss the chicken with butcher’s twine—this is an important step to help the chicken cook evenly (check the internet for how to do this). Rub the chicken with a light layer of olive or canola oil. Then rub liberally on all sides with thyme, rosemary, oregano or whatever spice mix you have a hankering for. Then place on the roasting rack over the veggies. I also like to let it sit out for around an hour so that the chicken has a chance to warm up to room temp.

For the roasting, start breast up and go for 30 minutes. Then, flip over so the back is up. Roast for around 40 minutes. Flip over again and roast for another 40 minutes or until the temp in the thigh near the body is 165 degrees F. Note that there may be a little carryover temp. Let the chicken rest for about 30 minutes while covered with foil. Then get your eats on! For smaller chickens (3-4 lbs) I would go for about an hour and a half total roasting time).

Wow, this is kind of long so I’m going to end here for now. I will post how I made the gravy a little later. It was freaking delicious.

Cheers!

Jake

Meet Seth!

2010-03-02T20:00:00.003-06:00

We had the absolute pleasure of spending the weekend with our good friends Natalie and Jordan, and the beautiful new addition to their family. I'm not sure what I enjoyed more: holding him (he's so TINY!) or photographing him (he's so CUTE!). Luckily, I got to do plenty of both :)

Congratulations, Natalie and Jordan!!!

Chocolate Mousse

2010-02-13T19:11:00.008-06:00

I am definitely not a food blogger. For one thing, that would require that I cook or bake regularly. For another thing...well, no - that's pretty much it.

However, I do like the concept - it's fun to see pictures of a delicious meal in its various stages of undress, as it were.

When we had some friends over for dinner last month, I decided to contribute by making dessert. And what's more dessert-y than chocolate mousse? Nothing, that's what.

This recipe came from The Bon Appetit Cookbook.

1/2c whole milk
2 large egg yolks
4 tbsp sugar, divided
6 oz bittersweet chocolate (not unsweetened) or semisweet chocolate, finely chopped
1 tsp vanilla extract
4 large egg whites
Pinch of salt

Whipped cream
Chocolate shavings (optional)

Chopped chocolate: I used Baker's semisweet chocolate, which actually broke apart quite nicely. You should probably be sure to taste-test it once or twice to ensure that it's of the desired quality. The mousse won't mind, really.

I used an egg separator to separate the yolks from the whites. More experienced bakers can just use the shell (I did this the second time around and it worked well). If you do use a separator, be sure that the eggs are cold, otherwise the yolk will leak through, laughing maniacally all the way. You want to make sure there is no trace of yolk in the egg whites, otherwise it won't beat and floof properly. Tip: separate the eggs in a small container, then transfer over to its final resting place to avoid contamination of the egg whites.

Whisk milk, egg yolks, and 2 tablespoons sugar in heavy saucepan to blend. Stir over medium-low heat until mixture thickens enough to coat spoon, about 7 minutes (do not boil). Remove from heat. Marvel over how white and creamy whole milk is...we drink nothing but skim in this house and now it looks even more watered down by comparison!

Ok, when they say medium-low heat, they lie like lying liars. Err on the side of low, and stir constantly while it's on the burner. Otherwise you will make scrambled eggs on the bottom of your pan, like I did, and have to start over. As much as I love scrambled eggs, the prospect of having them in my mousse makes me want to throw up a little.

Immediately add chopped chocolate and whisk until smooth. Whisk in vanilla. Try to avoid sampling at this point, because you really do want to make the mousse.

Transfer mixture to medium bowl; cool to lukewarm, stirring occasionally, about 10 minutes. Beat egg whites and salt in large bowl until soft peaks form.

Gradually add remaining 2 tablespoons sugar, beating until stiff but not dry. I know it's hard to tell from this picture, but the peaks really are stiffer than in the last. Hehe.

Fold whites into cooled chocolate mixture in 3 additions. Tip: On adding the first third, you can actually whisk it lightly. Thereafter, be sure to fold it gently. It's a fine line between fully incorporated and the ruination/fall of the floofy egg white empire, so be cautious!

This is what it looked like when I was finished folding. Now you really must taste this...it's freaking delicious.

Divide mousse among 6 goblets or transfer to a serving bowl. As you can see, I only got 5 servings out of this recipe. I choose to believe it has nothing to do with any sampling we did along the way, and everything to do with the size of the glasses I used.

Cover and refrigerate until cold and set, at least 6 hours. (Can be prepared 1 day ahead; keep refrigerated). I admit that I didn't cover it, and left it in the fridge only 4 or so hours. That seemed to work just fine.

Now, you can't really have chocolate mousse without whipped cream, can you? Not unless you're a crazy person. So I whipped up a batch. Literally! Ha - get it? Whipped up a batch? Shut up - I'm hilarious and you know it.

Anyway, whipped cream is really easy to make. I made mine vanilla flavored, but I'll bet almond or espresso or orange or face flavored would've tasted fabulous with this too.

1c chilled whipped cream

1 tbsp powdered sugar*

1/2 tsp vanilla extract

Beat cream, powdered sugar, and vanilla in large bowl until stiff peaks form. (Can be prepared 4 hours ahead. Cover and chill). That's it!

*I ended up adding a wee bit more powdered sugar, because I didn't think it tasted sweet enough.

And here, my friends, is is the final product!

Personally I thought it was just a touch too sweet, and if I were making it again I might go for a darker chocolate. However, everyone else who had it disagreed, including the sweet 18-month old being fed by her dad. I got the best compliment of all when, between bites, she suddenly announced, "good!" - which her dad said was a first! If that's not a ringing endorsement, I don't know what is!

I would also like to post a picture of the scrumptious dinner that preceded the dessert. Jake made lasagna, and made all of the ingredients (except the noodles) from scratch. He modified a recipe from one of his new favorite cookbooks, How to Cook Everything Vegetarian.

The modification? Meat.

Yum!

Super-Duper Important News About Me Of Course!

2010-02-04T15:51:00.004-06:00

Sarcmark:

So today is Thursday - the day after Wednesday, and two days after Tuesday in case you were really wondering. And if you want to get really technical, it's actually three days before Sunday. Well, I guess I'm not really sure how that is technical but l'm going to go with it for the time being.

So today, Thursday in case you forgot, I woke up late because I didn't set my alarm. I usually do, but just didn't last night for some unknown reason. This was quite a perplexing situation, I mean, why wouldn't I set my alarm when I always do? Were heavy things weighing on my mind? Some drama that my subsconscious already knew about just waiting to unfold? Maybe it was the winter doldrums that have pervaded my brain and body. Maybe I should start taking multi-vitamins that contain vitamin D. Well anyway, I got up, threw on my fluffy, winter robe and skittered downstairs to eat my favorite breakfast -- a delicious boxed cereal that I can't exclaim enough about. I mean that sugary crunch mixed with the ice-cold, low-fat milk just really gets my taste budding screaming for more. It's also quite nutritious and really helps me get the day off to a good start. Did I mention that it's very delicious. And good too.

After my extra delicious bowl of milky, crunchy, and awesome boxed cereal, I got dressed and made my way to work. This was my first real challenge of the day - trying to decide what route to take to work is always quite perplexing. There are several really good options that take about the same amount of time, but depending on the amount of traffic and other idiot drivers on the road it can be quite a subtle decision. Do I want to take a chance timing that left-turn light, or go straight on and brave the two extra four-way stops? Come to think of it, I can't really remember which way I did end up taking. Maybe my breakfast really isn't all that great after all. Maybe I need to switch to the breakfast of champions because, for sure, champions certainly don't agonize over which route to take to work. Actually, champions are probably rich and don't need to work anyway, so shit, maybe Wheaties won't work after all.

Well, I suppose I should get to work now that's it almost four in the afternoon. I won't say I spent all day on this, but it definitely took some brain-stretching effort.

I thank you, dear readers, for listening to the very important events that happened to me today - I know your day isn't quite complete unless you know these vital things about my life.

I look forward to writing more exciting and stimulating blogs for your edification.

End Sarcmark

JB

PS: If milk is really ice cold doesn't that mean it's a solid? Or does it simply mean that all the stuff in the milk depresses the freezing point? Hmmm....

Our Wedding: Blogged

2010-01-30T08:28:00.001-06:00

Jenna of Eat Drink Pretty featured our wedding on her blog. She writes about food (cooking/baking), and, well, "all things pretty." It was also through Jenna that I found the location for our anti-bridal photoshoot; her pictures there were gorgeous and very inspiring!

Check her out!

http://eatdrinkpretty.blogspot.com

Passport II

2010-01-21T20:23:00.001-06:00

So I thought I would follow-up with the whole passport post from months ago. It was my impetus, really, not my beautiful wife telling me to do it! :P

Some time ago I ended up searching the house for hours on a Saturday, looking everywhere. Sunday, Salwa looked for quite awhile (with me over her shoulder telling her I already looked there ... and there...). By Monday after work we were both ready to throw in the towel. I was seriously pondering where I had not looked as I tramped about the house.

Oh, I haven't looked in you yet, said I to the camera bag sitting on the chair.
Open side pocket, withdraw camera manual. And out came a little, blue passport with a cute picture of Salwa in it.

VICTORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, apparently, the passport came to Hawaii with us. At least it came back.

Taco Time!

2010-01-21T19:57:00.003-06:00

Homemade Tacos!

Well, the only thing that is really homemade is the taco seasoning (I liked this much more than the boxed stuff and Salwa commented that it was way less salty). I didn't make the refried beans or the taco shells because that would just be a little time consuming and silly to boot. So, anyhow, this is the recipe that I used. I won't say that I made this up, but I didn't follow any particular recipe. The taco seasoning is courtesy of Mark Bittman, How to Cook Everything Vegetarian - this is a fantastic book and is definitely helping me to embrace the cooking and snarfing of many things not meat. I highly recommend it. He has a meatosaurus version as well, but I haven't coughed up the moola for it yet. To the recipe. . .

Taco Seasoning

This is about enough for 1 pound of ground beef - so scale up a little if you really like heavier seasonings. Also notice no salt, as that is added during the cooking.

1 Tablespoon ground ancho (or any mild chile powder - not chili powder, although that may work too)
1/4 teaspoon cayenne or to taste
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground pepper (I usually use more while I'm cooking too)
1 teaspoon ground cumin
1 teaspoon ground coriander
1/2 Tablespoon mexican oregano (I think I used turkish, but it no matter, a little more may be good too)
1/2 teaspoon turkish sweet paprika (this was my addition - I bet it would be good with smoked spanish paprika as well)

Mix together. Double or triple if you want extra to store for later use. This is really a rough guideline so experiment as you please.

Taco Deliciousness

1 small to medium onion, small dice
1 green pepper, small dice
1 red pepper, small dice
1-2 Tablespoon olive oil - (I usually eyeball this)
1 lb ground beef, lean or fat is your choice (I usually add a little extra olive oil if it's very lean)
1/2 cup water
1/4 cup water + 1 teaspoon cornstarch (mix it like crazy right before you put it in so you have a slurry)
freshly ground pepper to taste
salt to taste (the guidelines below are based on using Kosher salt - use way less if you're using table salt)
stove
heavy pan
stirring spoon or four
plate and spoon
dark beach towel tucked into shirt (browns and dark blues work best)
significant other for washing dishes and serving you while you sit in your favorite comfy chair or couch (I really don't recommend eating tacos in bed)

Procedure:
Heat up pan first over medium to medium-high heat ~3-5 mins. Add olive oil and let heat for another minute or so.
Add onions and peppers (you already cut them up right?). Add about a teaspoon of salt over the veggies. Cook and stir frequently for about 6-8 minutes until softened.
Add ground beef and cook while breaking up into bits as desired. Keep stirring the whole mess around together.
While ground beef is cooking pour in the taco seasoning. (I like to do this to help wake up all those flavors in the spice mix.)
As beef is done cooking add the 1/2 cup of water and stir.
Add the 1/4 cup water with the cornstarch.
Stir and bring to gentle simmer.
Taste and season with salt. (I'd guess I added around 2-3 teaspoons, but let your tongue be your guide here)
Reduce heat and simmer for a few minutes.
Get your taco eats on.

Of course, like many, you probably have extensive experience snarfing tacos so I will not deign to tell you what to put on them.
One suggestion though - we really like greek yogurt (Fage) in place of sour cream. Add a little salt, pepper, and cumin to the yogurt to complement the taco flavors.

Cheers!

Jake

You Can Find Me at da Club

2010-01-17T11:46:00.001-06:00

So, I went out dancing with Jessica last night, and we had a great time as usual. As I often am, I was struck by a number of funny or irritating things that people did at the club, and thought I'd put together a little list. I'll try to keep it to stuff that's always been weird to me, not things I've become sensitized to over the years (such as do they really have to play the music SO loud?! And holy cow, you're so young, does your mother know what you're doing?!)

In no particular order...

Things People Do At The Club That I Don't Get:

1. Wear sunglasses. It's dark outside, it's dark inside, and you look like a moron. Take them off.

2. Talk on the phone. THEY CAN'T HEAR YOU, and you look like a moron. Put it away.

3. Text continuously. Not just to say 'hey, we're here, come meet us,' but for long enough that you must obviously be giving the other person a play-by-play of what's going on there. Do you really have to stay THAT connected?

4. Take pictures of yourself and your friends dancing. I actually saw one girl stop, interrupt a dancing stranger, and ask him to take a picture. She took two steps back and started "dancing" while making sure her smile was visible to the camera. What the hell is that? You need to manufacture proof that you're having a good time so you pose like it?

5. Winter gear on the dance floor. I'm not talking about those who wear their coats the whole time (though that's one too - you'll pay the cover and for drinks but can't spring $3 for the coat check?), I mean those with just a few select winter accessories on. They dress to impress...then throw on a hat. Or a scarf. REALLY? You look like a moron (and man that must be hot), take it off.

6. Hair dancing. This is something I've always thought looked stupid. Plus that can't be good for your neck.

7. Wear earrings that are long enough to thwap you in the face. Oh wait - that was me. Hehe. I forgot how swing-y that pair was. My bad!

8. Be that creepy guy that everyone's trying to get away from. You know the one I mean. You're gross, go away.

That's all I can think of for now. I'm sure there's more. In fact, feel free to add to my list. What has you shaking your head in amusement, pity, or disgust at the club?

In closing, here we are taking our traditional pre-dancing photos. Because we DON'T bring our cameras to the club.

Hotties about to hit the club

What Went Down in the 200Xs

2010-01-10T17:09:00.012-06:00

WARNING: A decade in review is a lot to cover...this post is long :)

I got this idea from my friend Natalie's blog and thought it'd be fun to take a look at the highlights of the past decade. Then I got to thinking, wouldn't it be fun if I could include some pictures from those years? (Shocker - I know). If you know me - and I think you do - then you're also not surprised that this lead to a whole photo location/digitalization/organization fiasco. I mean, project. Oops.

I tried to keep the words to a minimum, but again - you know me. If I missed something significant, please remind me - I have the worst memory!

Without further ado...

2000: Selected chemistry as my major. Became a U.S. citizen after passing a difficult 2-question quiz, one of which was, "When is Independence Day?" Began undergraduate research with Prof. Dave Alberg.

In Myers, sophomore year.

Chemist-in-training, summer 2000

"Happy New Citizenship" party that Anna threw for us.

2001: Presented my undergrad research at a local ACS conference. Turned 20. Recipient of Pfizer Undergraduate Research Award. Sang an all-time favorite, Carmina Burana, with the Carleton Choir. Lived in Dacie Moses house during 2nd summer of research. Spent a semester in France: awesome trip-mates, the best host mom, 9/11, stopped wearing a scarf, little brother visit, short vacation in Italy, Chemistry & General GREs, consumed many fresh baguettes and other delicious foods. Applied to grad schools in a kind of a rush when I got home.

Left: NMR day, invented by yours truly. Right: Sunday Brunch at Dacie Moses (part of my duties)

Left: Carcassonne w/Sultan Right: The Eiffel Tower w/Lina

Cinques Terres, Italy with Cookie, Jenna, Gerry and Luis

2002: Danced with Ebony II and became interested in dancing more. Senior voice recital with Ping. Received teaching award. Graduated from Carleton College with honors (but only one degree :P). Road trip to South Dakota. Began the PhD program in Organic Chemistry at UW-Madison. Joined Prof. Hans Reich's group for research. Made awesome new chemie friends.

Left: The Senior Voice Recital invitation I designed. Right: Dancing with Ebony II

Left: Our Comps group. Right: At graduation with my mom, V, and her mom.

2003: Entrenched in grad school classes, TAing (which I loved), grading, and research. Joined a university choir. Took lots of fun trips to Chicago and MN. Co-hosted my first Halloween party, at which my friend Kim was introduced to Marty's friend John. Sparks flew, I encouraged her to hang out with them again before he left, and Marty and I both took credit for them dating ;).

Left: Out with some of the ladies of our graduate chemistry class.

Right: About to go out to downtown Minneapolis, lookin bad-ass with Melissa, Shanda, and Angelique (Apparently I didn't get the memo that we were smiling!)

Left: Croquet with the Reich group! Right: The Halloween party that got Kim and John together ;)

I'm pretty sure this one was on a lake in Fon du Lac, WI! This was to see Ben's band play.

2004: Made the difficult decision to switch career paths and leave Madison with an M.S. degree. Moved back home despite promises of great job offers on warmer coasts (wasn't really sure why then...). Was offered an organic chemist position at 3M Pharmaceuticals (back when they existed), just before a hiring freeze took it off the table. Worked a few misc office jobs. Volunteered for the Brain Injury Association of MN. Hired as a temp at Medtronic. Hip-hop dance classes with Pazazz. Melissa's son Antoine was born in OK.

Left: Fighting with Joe the Undergrad Right: With Kim on my 23rd birthday at Six Flags

Left: Out with chemie friends in Madison. Right: Carving pumpkins with Kim and Margaret.

Meeting Melissa's son Antoine for the very first time, during their visit up to MN. He's 3 weeks old in this picture, and I fell straight in love with him!

2005: Kim & John married (I was a bridesmaid). Sultan graduated high school. Prior & Sarah married. Through a fortuitous meeting of friends, learned about CIMA, and started there in September. Met Jake, though I didn't realize the significance of that until much later. Returned to Madison for another Halloween on State Street. Kept dancing. Started making some good friends at work, including Natalie and Jessica.

Left: Sultan's graduation day. Right: Reich group members at Kim & John's wedding.

Left: Sarah and Prior, newly wed. Right: Some of the gang at Sarah & Prior's wedding.

2006: My mom married a wonderful man, Dennis, and they moved into a cute house on a lake together. Trip out east w/Sara; first visit to NYC = Love. Cohosted Sara's bridal shower. Sara & John married (I was a bridesmaid). Melissa & Antoine married (I was her MOH). Picked up running and ran my first and only race: a 5K. Started noticing Jake's existence. Hosted a Halloween party ostensibly because I had a great new apartment, but really to get some time w/Jake outside of work. Finally admitted to myself (and Jessica and Natalie) that I had a crush on him. Months of fun flirtation followed.

Left: Mom's wedding reception. Right: Carls at Sarah & John's wedding.

Left: Bridal party at Melissa & Antoine's wedding. Right: Sexy ladies at Melissa's wedding!

Left: Team Awesome is established! CIMA Summer Olympics.

Right: On the Freemont Bridge Troll w/Veronica!

Left: Jake didn't come dressed up to my Halloween party. I made him wish he had ;)

Right: The first picture Jake and I ever took together (at my Halloween party)!

2007: After a nerve-wracking January, finally started dating Jake! Realized he was the man I wanted to marry after 3 weeks (yes, really). Polar Plunge with Kim for charity. Feast at Magda's. Camping trip to North Shore w/Jake. Brian & Steph married. Nathan & Catherine married. Ben & Yi Jin married. Reunited with childhood best friend, Amy. Jake and I "came out" to the work friends who didn't already know about us. Sultan transferred to Maharishi University. Girls trip to Vegas with Marie & Natalie. I threw another Halloween party, but this time, Jake was a co-host instead of the secret guest of honor ;).

Left: Leaping into an icy lake. Note the expression on my face! Right: Time Square w/Sara.

Left: First Magda's Feast Right: Hiking at the North Shore

Left: At Ben & Yi Jin's wedding, with Kim and the beautiful bride.

Right: Top Gun-ing it with Sisson at Steph & Brian's wedding.

Left: Nathan and Catherine, newlywed. Right: With part of the gang at Nathan's wedding

Reunited w/Amy! I had to do a Then & Now for this one...I think we pretty much look the same ;)

Left: In Vegas with Marie & Natalie. And a random shark-man we found
Right: About to go out on the town in Vegas, dressed to impress

2008: Got Lasik. One of my best friends was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. Jake and I went to Costa Rica together on a GAP trip. My father passed away. Twin Cities MS Walk w/Natalie. John & Irene married. Natalie and Jordan moved to Grand Rapids. Ryan & Steph married. Road trip to Glacier National Park w/Jake. Ryan & Allison's daughter Lily was born. Fundraised, trained for and completed the Breast Cancer 3-Day Walk (60 miles!) with Steph. Jake and I got engaged! Wedding planning/vendor booking. My mom threw us a fabulous engagement party. Girls trip to Mexico w/Natalie and Jessica.

Left: In the rain forest with Jake, Costa Rica. Right: White water rafting in Costa Rica!

Left: 2008MS Walk w/Natalie. Right: At Ryan & Steph's wedding

Left: Celebrating life at Glacier National Park! Right: My birthday hike to Iceberg Lake

Left: My stunning engagement ring! (Photo by me).

Right: Excited for our future! (photo by Paige DeWees)

Left: With my wonderful mother at the engagement party she threw for us

Right: Enjoying a meal after some wedding gown goodness

Left: Meeting Lily for the first time; she was about a month old!

Right: Steph and I after the Breast Cancer 3-Day, 62 miles and about $6,000 later!

Left: At the top of a pyramid in Mexico w/Natalie & Jessica Right: Parasailing in Mexico

2009: Purchased an entry-level dSLR. Melissa's second son Josiah was born. Wedding planning, wedding planning, wedding planning. Jake and I moved in together. Trish & Pete got married. Twin Cities MS Walk w/Jessica. Melissa threw me a bridal shower. SUPER-fun Bachelorette Weekend in NYC w/Veronica, Kristi, Natalie and Jessica! Made the enormously difficult and painful decision to say goodbye to a close friendship that had already fallen apart despite my best efforts. Natalie became pregnant. Jake and I got MARRIED - floated on air during our whole, wonderful wedding day. Relaxing and romantic honeymoon in Kauai. Dove headfirst into photography. Co-hosted Natalie's baby shower along w/Jessica. Jake & I hosted our first GobbleGobble.Veronica and Naim got engaged! Enjoyed our first Christmas as husband and wife. Basked in the glow of being newlywed!

Left: Melissa's baby shower! Right: Meeting Josiah on the second day of his life - so special!

Before/After Bridal Shoot: photo by Erik Hendrickson, hair by Brynn Andre, makeup by Lisa Elsen

2009 MS Walk with Jessica

Left: With the gorgeous mothers at my bridal shower.

Right: With my beautiful bridal party at my shower.

Left: Moving Day 1: Out Right: Moving Day 2: In

Left: Trish & Pete, newly wed

Center: NYC Bachelorette Party!

Right: The only part of my extended family that could make it, at our rehearsal dinner.

Our Wedding Day!!!!

Honeymoon in Kauai

Anti-Bridal Shoot: photos by Ashley Marana, makeup by Lisa Elsen.

Left: Gobble Gobble at our place! Right: Both families (minus Kristi) at my Mom's on Xmas Eve

Left: Our pretty Christmas tree! Right: About to enjoy our first Christmas as newlyweds

Left: With Sultan & Hilda the Snow-Woman Right: Bullard Christmas part II

2010 Anticipated Goodness: Natalie & Jordan's son to be born in February!!! Ashley and Jared to marry in April! Veronica and Naim to marry in the fall! Jake and Salwa to go on another adventurous trip together! Much time to be spent with family and friends! And throughout it all, I plan on continuing to cultivate my photography skills...

The last 10 years have been filled with ups and downs, but mostly positivity and happiness, and for that I am grateful. Obviously these were many of the formative years of my adulthood, and although many circumstantial things have changed, and although I have grown and learned from all of my experiences, the core of what makes me "me" has been consistent throughout.

I can't wait to see what the next 10 will have in store for me us!

Anti-Bridal Shoot

2009-12-15T21:04:00.003-06:00

During the course of my wedding planning, I discovered a phenomenon that was taking over the wedding industry: something called "trash the dress" sessions. Apparently brides - or couples - would hire a photographer to do post-wedding photo shoots, and, well, trash their dresses.

Trash my dress?

Ha! Right. I'm going to spend umpteen dollars on a beautiful white gown, wear it to marry the man of my dreams, and then...trash it?

Roll around in the mud in it?

Take it for a little swim?

And pay for the documentation of the ruination of my dress, no less?

Thanks, but no thanks. Clearly a waste of time and money.

I'll admit, I spent my share of time on the Knot message boards - I found it a great resource when planning. As I started paying more attention to what people were posting, I noticed that a fair amount of these TDD sessions weren't really about trashing the dress. They depicted the bride - or bride and groom - in a slightly more relaxed setting, usually different from the one they got married in. She in her wedding gear, and he often sporting slightly more casual attire. A fun conceptual contrast.

The possibility took root.

I wasn't convinced overnight, and certainly up through the wedding I didn't give it too much thought. After things settled down a bit when we got back from our honeymoon, I started thinking that it might be nice to wear my wedding dress again. Might be fun to do a more "fashion-forward" photo shoot in our wedding gear. After all, we're not models - when again might we have this excuse to do something with more of an alternative look like this? Might be nice, too, to get some pics in our wedding gear that we could use for a holiday card (since we didn't think we'd be getting our wedding photos back in time - though Paige is awesome and delivered early).

So I broached the subject with Jake. He was totally down, and even thought of some great ideas (We went with kind of a glam rock vs. dapper gent theme). I did some searching online and found a fabulous photographer, Ashley Marana of Custom Obscura Photography, who was reasonably priced and very enthusiastic.

So, badabing, badaboom - an Anti-Bridal session was born. We had such a great time with Ashley and absolutely LOVED the photos!

Here are a few highlights:

Totally worth it!!!

My Friends

2009-11-20T09:03:00.000-06:00

Yesterday, Cough dropped by to join his friends Sniffles and Sneezles. It was a pretty unexpected visit, but I can't say that I blame him - Sniffles and Sneezles have been whooping it up for a few days now. Who wouldn't want to join that party? I think the Cough-meister seems to get along best with his buddy Scratchies, though. They really seem to have the teamwork thing down - Scratchies will command the spotlight for awhile, and just as she steps down, Cough takes right over and makes sure the show goes on. Man, those four...

I could really do without Stuffedeezles. He's more of a pest than anything, and I keep spraying stuff at him, hoping he gets the hint and leaves forever, but he just keeps coming back like that damned cat. The others aren't big fans of him either - Stuffedeezles makes Sniffles' job harder, and Sneezles and he are just polar opposites; whenever she's around, he leaves the room in a big RUSH! Always comes back though.

Tummy knots (Tumnots for short) isn't really part of the clique, but she's there too. It's kind of sad, she'll look up at them - chilling on the pedestal she's set them on - on the outside, looking in at the cool kids. They don't really give her the time of day, but she keeps hanging out, hoping one day they'll take notice.

I don't mean to sound like an ungrateful host or anything, but I think these friends of mine have overstayed their welcome just a wee bit. They're just a little too hard on the furniture, if you catch my drift, and while it's been...an experience, I think I'd like my body - er, house back now.

A Taste of Kauai

2009-11-04T20:57:00.002-06:00

This post is long overdue...oops! Better late than never :)

Now I know what you're thinking.

"What could possibly top a perfect wedding day?" you wonder.

Not much, my friend. Not much.

Perhaps a perfect honeymoon could...and we would know! We had the most fantastic time in Kauai - it was extremely relaxing, utterly gorgeous, and very, very romantic ;).

I will forever treasure the memory of our first vacation as a married couple, our first beach-not-adventure-based trip, our first visit to Hawaii (because you'd better believe it won't be our last), our first missed flight (whoops), our first helicopter ride...

But if memory should happen to fail us, there are over 2,000 pictures to give our minds a little kick in the pants! (Stop. Picture minds wearing pants. Resume.)

No, I'm not kidding, and no, I'm not crazy.

I have a thing or two to tell you about my ever-growing passion for photography, but that's a story for another post.

In the meantime, here is a small taste of Kauai...

On our walk to breakfast the first morning, it started raining very suddenly. Luckily the parking lot was lined with huge, beautiful trees that kept us dry until it passed.

Sunset kiss by the ocean! (near Brennecke Beach)

Lithified cliffs

Jake pausing to take it all in.

Laying out on the cliffs, overlooking Shipwreck Beach

We did a tour of the island by helicopter. I wasn't sure I was all that interested in it at first, but I'm so glad we did this - there's no way we would have been able to see some of the amazing views we saw otherwise. For example, Waimea Canyon from above...

And the Napali coast. We need to come back to do an ocean Kayak trip down this coast...simply gorgeous.

The day we picked to drive up the Waimea Canyon was unfortunately a very hazy one. Here we're pausing at one of the many lookouts up the drive.

Sunset on the west side of the island: Polihale State Park. We got there using the guidebook we brought with us (The Ultimate Kauai Guidebook, one book of a Hawaii series that we highly recommend), which instructed us to "turn left at the monkey pod tree." Oddly enough, it was crystal clear where we were meant to turn!

Us!

"Walk Like a Salwa"

Enjoying a gelatto in the Poipu Village Shopping Center. Kauai is known for its shave ice (not shaved, but shave), but I much preferred the rich creaminess of this Italian treat.

A few decades ago, a hurricane hit a chicken farm and scattered them all across the island. Now the population is out of control, and these guys were everywhere. And I do mean everywhere. They also seemed to have lost their sense of time, and crowed during all hours of the day and night!

We checked out the lighthouse from afar.

Due to our "accidental" purchase of a new zoom lens, were able to get a nice close-up shot of it too!

On our beach. Fine, not ours, but the beach our resort was on: Poipu Beach, reputed to be the finest swimming beach on the island. We heartily agreed, and spent several hours hanging out there almost every day. It was utterly relaxing, and I now understand what a draw it is for people to live by the ocean.

Another gorgeous view of the ocean and coastline, this time on the North Shore.

The ocean

A quick stop at Lydgate Beach Park before heading back to the resort. Apparently this one is great for beginner snorkeling, but we didn't get around to trying it out.

That's me up there! I took a powered hang-gliding lesson...not quite the same as I'd imagine flying would feel, but still a very cool experience!

The courtyard of our resort. Beyond the palm trees is the ocean. Sublime...

Enjoying Poipu Beach

We woke up one morning to this pretty rainbow - the view is from our balcony.

On our way back from one of the beaches, we spotted this spider in the bed of a pickup truck next to our jeep. Just chillin there like it belonged. There is, of course, no way I'd have gotten so close to this spider if it weren't for the 300mm upper range on the zoom lens we bought!

Enjoying the sunset on our last night in Kauai.

Before this, I was never particularly interested in Hawaii when there were so many other places in the world that I have to visit. I was never really a lay-on-the-beach type, either, since you can't do much exploring from a prone position. But I get it now - both the beaching and the fascination with Hawaii - and I can't wait to go back! I think it'd make a great anniversary trip, don't you?

Mahalo!

Little blue important thing

2009-10-26T20:37:00.003-05:00

Hi. Wow, that was such a nice welcome. Thanks! And don't get too excited for copious amounts of posts (or a plethora)! :P Yes, I'm just too dang lazy to start my own blog let alone write down all the random stuff floating around in my head on a daily basis - plus it would probably be way too disturbing for public view anyway.

Ahhh… a fresh, blank sheet of paper (albeit digital). How long it has been. Time for an entertaining little anecdote. Yes. The story will flow out of my mind and somehow traverse its way downward into my arms and out of my fingertips and into these eensy weensy keys on the keyboard. Ok. Enough of a warm up. Time to get going. Ready go.

Some people call this game 20 questions. I like to call it "where the hell are you!!!!!!!!?"

Are you in the fireproof safe amongst all our important files? You know, with the car title, insurance documents, an expired driver’s license from 1998, and some pens.
Are you in the filing cabinets with all our bank statements and tax returns?
Are you in one of the 30 bags of random receipts, pens, notepads, and neon highlighters?
Are you on the book shelves filled with our glorious, yet fledgling collection of good reads?
Are you in the computer and camera boxes with other important thing-a-ma-jigs thrown in for good measure? And a 12V adapter I’ve had since fourth grade?
Are you in with the Xmas and Halloween decorations?
How about below the kitchen sink with all the cleaning supplies and molasses?
Are you in the cooler in the garage that is filled with my sandals and a Nintendo 64 … and fake spiders?
How about in the Rubber Maid bins that haven’t been opened since Salwa graduated from college (the first time)?
Sigh. Recheck 1 through 9.
Not in the three plastic bags filled with sundry journals and notebooks… and pens.
Not under the couch.
Not in the food processor – hey! – I pulled out the blade.
Are you in the new buffet and hutch that we bought after we moved here?
Are you under the bathroom sink? Definitely not in the toilet tank, but had to check right?
Not in the sac of makeup (I just wanted to say sac – and spell it wrong in the process).
Not in 40 volumes of picture albums.
Not in the glove compartment of our cars, but I did find a good snack.
Not in every box in the house that we still have not unpacked—although now each one of those has been unpacked and repacked *coughthrowshitbackininhaphazardfashion* at least four times.
Not under the carpet that was installed seven years before we moved in. (I didn’t actually pull it up but did feel for lumps … it was overdue for a checkup anyway.)
Where the hell are you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?

Conclusion pending. :)

Guest Author

2009-10-20T19:30:00.000-05:00

As some of you know, my husband (hee hee, that phrase still makes me feel all delicious!) also writes. Back when he was active on myspace, I enjoyed reading his blog posts - either his short fiction pieces, or his witty little musings on this/that/your face. Although life has gotten in the way, I feel that he is probably like me - a writer at heart. I don't know if he'll ever start a blog himself, but in the meantime, I've just invited him to join mine, and as such, he will hopefully be making a guest appearance or two with some fun reading material of his own!

And now let's all give a hearty welcome to Jake, Superblog Guest Author!

7 Deadly Sins (aka Procrastination)

2009-09-21T21:42:00.002-05:00

Wrath
Who did you last get angry with?	A slow-functioning, error-filled website. We had words...it got ugly.
What is your weapon of choice?	My evil glare of doom. Never let it cast its laser-light shadow on you. Yes, it's a little paradoxical.
Would you hit a member of the opposite sex?	Depends. Were they keeping chocolate from me?
How about the same sex?	Only if she promised not to pull my hair in response, and fight back like a real man. Er, woman.
Who was the last person who got really angry at you?	Probably John.
What is your pet peeve?	Ha! Which one? We'll pick one out of the hat...how about people who don't understand the concept of merging?
Do you keep grudges, or can you let them go easily?	Me? No. I totally don't remember or resent you for that time in 3rd grade when YOU took the sparkly purple marker when I was clearly reaching for it.
Sloth
What is one thing you're suppose to do daily that you haven't?	Tooth-flossing. Sorry Jessica...I'm trying.
What is the latest you've ever woken up?	Ever in my life? I don't know, ask my mother.
Name a person you've been meaning to contact, but haven't?	Louise. Not Thelma though.
What is the last lame excuse that you made?	My excuses are never lame: "I was run over by a birthing elephant who ate my sick dog's homework in traffic."
Have you ever watched an infomercial all the way through?	Considering I almost exclusively watch things I DVR...yes. Yes, I have.
How many times did you hit the snooze button on your alarm clock this morning?	There's a snooze button on that thing? Guess I should put the hammer away...
Gluttony
What is your overpriced yuppie beverage of choice?	I don't drink a lot of that stuff...although Jessica and I did notice a giant jug of mango iced tea at Trader Joes, for a fraction of the price Caribou charges for a single cup. It wasn't iced and ready to go though, so...
Are you a meat eater?	Mmm. Meat. Best meat quote comes from my brother when he was 14: "God made cows for me."
What is the greatest amount of alcohol you've had in one sitting/outing/event?	Hehe. I prefer to field this question to Ryan or Matt...it'd be funnier that way.
Are you comfortable with your drinking and eating habits?	Maybe not today. Today included a Twix and 290 pieces of pound cake with leftover amaretto gelato. Also, beans.
Do you enjoy candy and sweets?	No, thanks, none for me.
Which do you prefer: sweets, salty foods or spicy foods?	First sweet, then salty. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Have you ever looked at a small house pet or child and thought, "lunch"?	Who hasn't?
Greed
How many credit cards do you own?	3. No, 4. I have no idea.
If you had a million dollars, what would you do with it?	First: pay off debt. Then: buy the biggest chocolate bar known to man. Also: a treadmill.
Would you rather be rich or famous?	Rich. I'll leave fame for those who don't mind having their private lives on display.
Would you accept a boring job if it meant that you would make megabucks?	Depends - how boring are we talking and define megabucks.
Pride
What's one thing that you have done that you're most proud of?	Stayed awake during certain post-lunch meetings. You know who you are.
What's one thing you have done that your parents are most proud of?
What thing would you like to accomplish late in your life?	I'd like to have traveled the world!
Do you get annoyed by coming in second place?	Not always, depends on where I was in developing whatever skill went into the contest.
Have you ever entered a contest of skill, knowing you were of much higher skill than all the other competitors?	Watermelon seed spitting? No - Mike always won that. Or was it Jessica?
Have you ever cheated to get a better score?
What did you do today that you're proud of?	Resisted buying more books.
Lust
How many people have you seen naked (not counting movies, family, strippers, locker rooms)?
How many people have seen you naked (not counting physicians, doctors, family, locker rooms, or when you were a young child)?
Have you ever caught yourself staring at the chest/crotch of a person of your chosen sex during a normal conversation?	No, but when certain people of my not-chosen sex wear certain shirts, it's hard not to read what's there...
What is your favorite body part of a person of your gender choice?	His smile and/or eyes. Scandalous, I know!
Have you ever had sexual encounters (including kissing/making out) with multiple persons?	Nope
Have you ever been propositioned by a prostitute?	Nope!
Envy
What item of your friends would you most want to have for your own?	If I could pick one talent from each friend and acquire it for myself, I'd be some kind of ULTRA-amazing person!!
Who would you want to go on "Trading Spaces" with?	Natalie and Jordan! I like their house a LOT. And their neighborhood. Wait, what's the premise of the show?
If you could be anyone who existed in the world, who would you be?	Myself. Truly!
Have you ever been cheated on?	Yep. Good times...
Have you ever wished you had a physical feature different from your own?	I LIKE MY TOES, DAMMIIT!
What inborn trait do you see in others that you wish you had for yourself?	Patience. No, that's over-rated. Mabye the anti over-analysis trait?
What deadly sin...
Do you do the most often?	Wrath! Fear me!!!! Muwhahaha! Ha! Ha! Ha?
Do you do the least often?	Greed. Except when it comes to chocolate.
Is your favorite to act on?	Oh, I think you know ;)
Take this survey at PimpSurveys.com

Home Alone...

2009-09-16T22:14:00.000-05:00

Back when I had a myspace account (that I actually used), I think it was somehow more acceptable to write a quick, inane blog about nothing. It only went out to my friends - always under 100 people, even at its high point. Probably a handful of them actually read it. So if it was boring and mundane, who cared? I don't consider myself a "blogger" - I'm sure I don't write enough for that - but still, I almost feel like I can't do that here. Although I probably don't have a long list of loyal readers like a real blogger, it's still a public forum, so maybe I feel inclined to post only when I have something I think is worth reading. Not sure why. Clearly all of my words are fascinating and worth very close scrutiny. Anyway...I'm rambling. Which is ok, because I'm tired.

Whatever. My blog, my rules!

Muwhaha! Let the mundanity run rampant!

I need to go to bed. Just got home from a movie w/Kristi, which was lots of fun! We saw the Proposal, and one part made me cry from laughing so hard. Not bad for a chick flick. Jake is out of town for work....sigh. I don't care if it's sappy or silly, I kinda miss him. Yes, already. Whatever - bite me. I'm so in love with him it's ridiculous.

Know what else is ridiculous? The fact that I'm exhausted but still not going to bed. I shoot myself in the foot...wait - what's the expression? The one that means hindering yourself? Anyway, I do that often with sleep. ZZZZzzzzzzz.

Seriously, I'm going to go do that now. And because I'm me, I shall end with a weirdo picture.

PS - I like this rambling thing. I'm even going to create a label for it. So there.

BLISS

2009-09-06T08:18:00.002-05:00

I'm not even sure what to say here - words can't describe how sublimely wonderful our wedding day was. It was a beautiful, emotional, love-filled day. We were thrilled that so many of our close family and friends were there to celebrate with us. All the hard work we put into planning it ensured that everything fell into place, but all the details faded in importance on the actual day. From the moment I woke up, my thoughts centered around marrying Jake - this was the day we would be joined as husband and wife, and pledge to spend the rest of our lives together! I was in a state of euphoria all day, and I think it's safe to say that Jake was too :)

I love my husband!!!

Jake and Salwa sitting in a tree....hehehe.

Here are a few snapshots of the day, courtesy of the highly talented Paige DeWees (disclaimer: these are low-res photos and are not meant for printing).

Spending some of our last engaged moments together in downtown Wayzata

My handsome husband (that word is like a shiny new toy, I'm fascinated by it!)Loitering by the train tracksCaught kissing on camera! That happened a lot ;)Bridal portraitJake looks serene; I look a little startled. Still like this picture though.
Walking down the aisle, escorted by my lovely mother and handsome step-fatherOne of my all-time favorite pictures of Jake. This was what was waiting for me at the top of the aisle. You can see the love and anticipation radiating in the expression on his face!Sand Ceremony"You may now kiss your bride!"

Our families love each other - we're very fortunate in that! Me with my beautiful ladies. Probably my favorite bridal party picture with the girls - and there were a lot of good ones!With our adorable flower girl and ring bearer, trying to get them (well, him) to stand still for a moment! With our whole wedding party - whee!First dance. Jake sends me into a spinSunset silhouette

The Beginning...let our adventures continue!

Sunny with a High of 74, 0% Rain

2009-08-22T06:41:00.003-05:00

I'M GETTING MARRIED TODAY!!!!!!

Breast Cancer 3-Day

2009-08-14T19:26:00.004-05:00

Last year, I participated in the Twin Cities Breast Cancer 3-Day Walk. I gave most of my spring and my entire summer to training (to walk 60 miles in 3 days), and fund raising (to meet the $2200 required minimum). It was an incredibly challenging and incredibly rewarding experience that left its mark on my life.

What I remember most vividly is not the agony of the 19th, 47th, or 61st mile (yes, we walked an extra mile and half, and yes, we damn well felt it), but how I felt when we came across our first cheer station. The sidewalk was lined with people holding treats and signs, and they were all cheering and clapping for us. That put a smile on my face and a spring in my already-weary step, but when I happened to catch the eye of one man who looked directly at me and said, "thank you so much for walking," I got it. I profoundly understood the importance of what we were doing, as no number of painfully slow laps around the Chain of Lakes or hours spent outside Walmart selling rubber duckies ever could. The memory of that man's heart-felt expression of gratitude still makes me cry.

After the walk was over, Steph (my teammate and walking buddy) and I agreed that while we wouldn't be walking the 2009 3-Day, we would definitely be at those cheer stations, trying to do our part to give the walkers that extra little boost that we at first found refreshing, and towards the end, near-critical. This year, the walk is August 21-23rd. It starts bright and early one week from today.

Next weekend is...somewhat busy for me. I made prior plans about a year ago, and they're somewhat inflexible. I am still thinking of trying to make it out to the Lake Harriet Cheer Station on Friday morning before 11, but that will depend on a few things falling into place (Steph, if you're reading this, can you make it??).

Whether I do or don't make it out to cheer, the walkers will be in my thoughts next weekend. It is a long, long 60 miles that they must walk, after an even longer journey of training and asking people for money. None of it is easy, but it's so, so necessary. If you know someone participating in the 3-Day, it's not too late to contribute! Every donation helps. And if you're free next weekend, do consider going out and cheering, even if you don't personally know someone who's walking. (Cheer stations are listed here). Trust me, it makes all the difference.

Antsy!

2009-08-12T07:06:00.000-05:00

10 days to go, and time just now seems to have sloooowwed down.

Which I guess is ok, since we do have some details to wrap up - some minor, some less so. And I do have a lot more to finish at work before I leave. (I've only just recently had to struggle to keep my focus - being so busy leaves me no choice but to stay on track). But I'm really not known for my patience, and I'd really rather just fast-forward to the few days before the wedding! And, go.

I think we're close enough to the date where the excitement and anticipation are a much more tangible, and oh-so-tasty dish. I have things like my dress fittings, recent hair trial, and much MORE recent make-up trial that give me slender glimpses of the wedding day. Oh, I can't wait!!!

Here are two pictures from yesterday's makeup trial. There'll only be a few minor changes (the most noticeable of which will probably be that the lashes will be trimmed a little), but beyond that it's exactly what I wanted! Brynn of Brynn Andre Beauty did the makeup. She's super-awesome to hang out with and did a fabulous job!!

Have I mentioned I can't wait??

And There it Is...

2009-07-29T07:07:00.000-05:00

The final countdown is on, and it appears that I'm finally starting to have wedding dreams. Not nightmares necessarily (I mean, unless a mass murderer is chasing you down the aisle with a hacksaw, is it really a nightmare?), but still. It's invaded my subconsciousness.

When we first started planning our wedding, I didn't think I'd care about the details. I was oh so very wrong. I took myself by surprise by really getting into it, and for the most part, I've really, really enjoyed wedding planning.

But now my life has recently boiled down to two elements: Work and Wedding. This year has been an insanely busy one for work, and one with a high degree of professional growth. I've been grateful for that, but there's no doubt it would have been easier and less stressful had I not had this major, time-consuming (and at times, thought-consuming) thing going on in my personal life too.

I never wanted to be one of those girls who was incapable of talking about anything but her wedding...hopefully I've managed that for the most part. Probably not lately though. It's all these little details that are left, taking up all my (well, our, to be fair) time. Want to go see a movie? Sorry, I have to do wedding stuff. Let's go to dinner. Great, can I get paper for my wedding programs there? Wedding wedding wedding wedding wedding wedding wedding wedding. Have I mentioned wedding? Also wedding.

Sigh.

I can't wait to marry Jake, can't wait for our honeymoon...and I can't wait to have our lives back!

PS - Wedding.

Bachelorette Party in NYC! (warning: lots of pics)

2009-07-12T11:16:00.000-05:00

I didn't expect to have a bachelorette party. For one thing, I wasn't keen on the traditional, bar-hopping kind. It kind of drew up connotations of inappropriate, even treasonous (!) behavior, and although I'm not that type of girl, it still put me off a little. And for another, I had already had a wonderful bridal weekend with my girls, part of which was planned by my maid of honor. I know a lot of work went into that. So I didn't really feel right asking them to plan anything else. Plus the summer's busy for everyone, right?

Wrong.

My girls had other ideas. When my near-and-dear Veronica heard from another bridesmaid I wasn't planning on having a bachelorette party, she cried, "I call dirty monkey shenanigans!" The girls huddled, the scheming began, and the idea of a girls trip was broached. Maybe to Chicago. Or Vegas.

"Or," said Veronica, "my dad does have a vacant apartment in New York City. I could call and ask if we could stay there over a long weekend. I'm sure he'll say yes."

They figured long holiday weekend over 7/4 would be perfect, since that way I wouldn't have to take any days off work. (I can ill-afford to, having allotted most of them for the honeymoon and being beyond-busy at work!). Later that night as we were lounging tiredly at my place, Veronica asked me if I might be interested in the plan they'd hatched.

Um, YES!!!!!

They seriously could not have picked a better way to celebrate with me. I LOVE traveling, and take every opportunity I get to go somewhere new. I love spending time in big cities. (My travel style varies from outdoor adventure to urban exploration to anything else you can think of). I'd only ever spent 1 day in NYC, and loved it so much I vowed to go back. And as much as I'm looking forward to seeing the world with Jake, I love girls trips!

I was so, so touched that they wanted to do this and made it happen. If I had to pick the ideal bachelorette party scenario, this would have been it in a heartbeat!

Veronica took the initiative to do some research, and planned out lots of fun activities for us. She took the responsibility for figuring out how to get us from point A to B, R and Z, and was a great orchestrator. Thank you so much V!!

So what'd we do? We walked, we ate, we shopped, hung out on the roof (what a view!), we enjoyed some fine dining, we danced, and overall, we had SO MUCH FUN!!!

But pictures tell it better than I can. So here are some (ok, lots) for you to enjoy :)

In the van on the way to the apartment from the airport. So unsuspecting...

After a quick and scrumptious meal at a local pub, we took ourselves to the rooftop for a gorgeous night-time view of the city. I'd call this a birthday well-spent!

Friday, about to venture out into the city.

After some walking, we decided to stop into a random pizzeria. And oh, what a great choice it was! The owner Anthony was chatty and very friendly. He asked what brought us to NYC and the girls told him it was in honor of my pending marriage. They asked if he was married, and he said with a palpable degree of pride, "Sure am. Best thing I ever did." Awwww!

Oh - and the pizza was damn delicious too! Once I discovered the lasagna pizza, I devoured it. The other one was relegated to second place/left-overs.

Resting after a long afternoon of shopping and walking.

What summer girls trip is complete without a pedi?

Hanging out on Church Street while V acquired a cold, caffeinated beverage. We had beautiful weather the whole weekend!

Headed to Kittychai for some gourmet Thai food.

The ambiance was warm and rich. Very pretty!

Veronica's drink was just that glorious!

I can't remember the name of this appetizer, but it was scrumptious.

Taking the subway back. I love the subway. I wish we had better public transportation here!

Enjoying some sunset roof time before getting ready for round 1 of dancing.

Ahhh, what a view...

Beautiful Girls...at the wrong stop. In the wrong direction. Whoopsie.

Resting our weary feet at Le Poisson Rouge

Posing in the throne. Just call me Queen Salwa!

Saturday, enjoying a beautiful day in Time Square. Here with my fabulous future sister-in-law Kristi

So many buildings!

Who let these weirdos on the subway?

We enjoyed a picnic in Central Park. This is me reveling in the glory that is east-coast bagels.

Relaxing in Central Park

We stopped to take in a street show of comedic gymnasts.

One of them somersaulted over 5 people, including myself!

The Bethesda Fountain. We contemplated splashing around in there, like they did on the opening scene of friends. Then we posed nicely and left.

We visited the Alice and Wonderland sculpture...

And the Hans Christian Anderson sculpture.

The Dakota Building

And then, after a few moments rest, it was time for the official bachelorette night to commence!! I was given a lovely tiara and boa, which I wore proudly.

I think they brought out the silly in me ;)

At the Taj, first for dinner, then for dancing.

The food was delectable!

The service was fabulous :)And the company...well, the company was incomparable. I mean, look at us.

Wait. Don't look now.Ok, resume looking.Self-photos are a must in a situation like this.

Veronica was quite skilled in the art of boa dancing. I tried to take notes, but...well...

Somehow I don't think I came off quite the same way. Do you think my flying at people like a chicken is what kept them away?

Hehe...just kidding. (Well, not really. I did kind of use the boa as a shooing device, but that's neither here nor there).Here they are, part of the best bridal party in the world, and my wonderful travel companions on a trip I'll never forget!

They may not ever read this, but a HUGE thank you goes to our absentee hosts, Veronica's father and step-mom. I will forever be grateful for their generosity in letting us stay in their home, sending us an incredibly thoughtful congratulatory gift, and making this trip possible!!

Really?

2009-06-27T17:21:00.004-05:00

I just spent the last I-don't-know-how-long putting together floral arrangments for my centerpiece mockups. This involved an indordinate number of vases, a white table cloth, black runner, black napkins, and 3 types of flowers. All because I'm incapable of putting my imagination to use to visualize what things might look like. I mean, really? Does it actually really matter?

Normal-person answer: No. No one will notice the damn centerpieces, and whether they have just the right degree of color and contrast.

Bridezilla answer: Of course it matters, you fool! Every last detail is of utmost importance! And they WILL notice, because I will MAKE them notice! I will command my army (bridesmaids) to accost each and every guest and point out the awesomeness of the centerpieces and force everyone to agree or be kicked out! RAWWWWWWWWWWWWWRRRRRRRR!!

Unsent Letter (v.2)

2009-06-25T07:06:00.001-05:00

The last time I wrote an “unsent” letter, it was an extremely cathartic experience. I don’t really think it’ll quite work that way this time, and yet I am compelled.

I miss you.

Wait. That’s not exactly what I meant to say.

Let me start over.

Dear __________,

I still dream about you, periodically and with frustrating consistency. In each of these dreams the general plot is the same: we’ve run into each other and we chat pleasantly, a light talk during which I wish silently that we would be friends again. Your SO’s expression of disgust, not necessarily meant for transmission but received nonetheless, cross my mind and make me leery. Yet we talk and smile, and hope swirls. You admit that you miss me, and I think the same, but the words don’t always make it past my lips.

Each time I dream the dream, I wake up sad. There is no transitional ether of half-consciousness where I confuse reality with wishes. I know right away what’s what, and am acutely aware that what I dream will probably never materialize.

These dreams are frustrating, because I’m trying to move on. They’re enlightening, because they make me realize that I haven’t.

It’s so strange, because thinking back to everything that transpired, I don’t know that I could have done anything differently. Someone else in my shoes maybe, but me, no. I know my personality, and my limitations. I cannot read minds, so silence is just silence. I cannot endlessly pursue, I cannot be the only initiator, and when I feel continuously rebuffed, even knowing that there may be mitigating reasons, I find it difficult not to withdraw.

I fought against my own nature until I couldn’t anymore. I half-yielded and waited. I lost full nights of sleep. As the months slipped by, a poisonous cycle of caving and contacting and achieving the same non-results pushed me ever lower. I didn’t know that that last attempt at reaching out would be the last, but it broke me, and I was done.

I wished you well and bid you Goodbye.

Even on examining each decision point and coming to the same conclusion that I did then, I still feel like I horribly mismanaged the relationship. I still feel like I failed. It’s odd and contradictory, and unsettling. I don’t like it. That niggling feeling that I should have acted differently is banished by logic, only to rear its reproachful head on waking from wistful dreams.

But it’s not just guilt and confusion and worry I feel when my thoughts settle on, or are pushed to, the subject of you. It’s sadness and regret, because I do really miss you. You’re going through X without me, and I’m going through Y without you, and a large part of me is still in disbelief that this is the case. I never would have imagined…

I almost feel as if we were cheated out of something. Out of our own sort of forever, because that’s what we had both counted on.

Maybe…maybe…(probably not, but) maybe…

I still wish you a life of love, health and happiness, and sincerely hope you’re well.

Love,
Salwa

Ramblings on Beauty

2009-06-18T06:39:00.004-05:00

I have a lot to write about, but no time to write it.
In the meantime, here's something I wrote on October 9, 2007.

Hello. I'm home sick. I feel fine, except for when I try to move. Then I get all dizzy and stuff. It's awesome. Anyway. I'm going to ramble now.

Unlike most (straight) men, I have no problem identifying members of my own gender as attractive. Gorgeous, beautiful, pretty, cute, sexy, hot…each is its own label (and yes, they mean different things), and I can apply them to men and women alike. (Well, I wouldn't usually use pretty for a dude…unless I'm qualifying someone as too pretty for my tastes, so never mind, I guess I would).

Anyhow, what I find interesting is that I've noticed that the women I think are stunning tend to have the physical traits that attract me to a man – namely, dark features (hair & eyes), and an interesting look (arresting eyes, etc).

Let me explain. For men: I can identify men who are, societally speaking, attractive, whether or not I'm attracted to them. This probably has to do with symmetry of the face – nice, balanced features, along with white teeth, nice hair, blahdeeblahdeeblah. But – and I've finally come to accept this – for me to be attracted to a man (based on looks alone at least), he needs to have dark hair and dark eyes, and a slightly more "rugged" look. Less Dean Cain, more…oh, I don't know, Patrick Dempsey, if his hair were shorter and less carefully disheveled, to give celebrity examples.

I'm not attracted to women, but although I can recognize female beauty as dictated by society, the women whom I think would be gorgeous by anyone's standards tend to be brunettes, and have dark or otherwise intense eyes. Growing up in a culture in which blondes reigned as the epitome of sexiness (whether or not this has changed since my more formative years), I think it's interesting that my natural proclivities reign, even in an area of little biological interest to me.

Boisterous Bridal Broohaha!

2009-05-19T18:17:00.002-05:00

What a fabulous weekend I just had! I got to spend lots of time with my favorite ladies, and it so much fun to be all "bridal" and stuff. I can't believe how quickly time has passed...the wedding will be here before we know it! Yay!

With my beautiful bridal party. I love you ladies!!

(I also love that Kristi made me a ribbon & bow bouquet!)

What? She wouldn't promise to crimp her hair and wear a big bow in it for the wedding ...pretty sure my reaction was warranted.

Invitation assembly goodness. This was a big help and was lots of fun!Thanks ladies! :)I'd thought this would be it for pre-wedding bridal funosity (since I don't want a traditional bachelorette party), but my girls schemed up what could be the perfect way to celebrate!
Stay tuned...

Such a Sap

2009-05-11T20:24:00.001-05:00

I don't care if it's sappy and mushy...I'm so excited for our wedding and (more importantly) everything it represents! I am so excited for our future, and feel so happy and grateful that we found each other. I cannot imagine a more perfect man with whom to be partners, to raise children, to join families, to give and receive support, to be myself, and of course to share fun adventures. To think that I doubted that I'd find this kind of love and happiness and "perfect fit"-ness...I feel so, so lucky.